


Mother Of Pearl (Old, Discontinued)

by Kirrithian



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Arm Wrestling, Canon Divergent, Canon divergent post movie, Crystal Gems, Cuckoo in the nest, Diamonds aren't forgiven as easily, Diamonds don't change that easily, I am a Pearl!, Limited swearing, Other Pearls - Freeform, Rebel Pearls, Singing, The Diamonds - Freeform, Unbreakable orders, Volleyball who?, White hurt pinks pearl, White makes pearls, more secrets, past pearls, pearls, petrification
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2020-12-24 23:55:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 33,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21108080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kirrithian/pseuds/Kirrithian
Summary: As echoes of the past continue to haunt Steven, Pearl faces up to her predecessors fate, and her own. Will the Pearls ever truly be free?My (Very) initial post-movie interpretation of the Pearls back story. I started writing this v. shortly after having seen Steven Universe through the first time, and after a long LONG break in my writing, and have not only developed my writing but my understanding of Steven Universe since.I have taken the decision to discontinue this form of this piece. I am re-writing it, and plan on completing this now canon divergent story. Changes such as the addition of a prologue, and an increased number of chapters (breaking down the existing story chapters a bit to make it easier on myself) wouldn't work with this piece existing as it is, and I wish to keep this as an example of my old writing, so I can see how and where I've developed in the future.Will post chapter to confirm discontinuation once I have the first set of chapters up for the updated version.





	1. Broken Pearl

The door to the bathroom opened and with a clank the balanced can toppled and doused Steven Quartz Universe head to toe in bright pink paint.

  
“Nooooooo! I just showered!” He lamented as he fell to his knees, arms wide. It added to the drama-Jamie had been giving him lessons. “Why mee?” he wailed and hold for two, three fou-Wait a minute, pink paint? That could only mean- “Spinel?” He called out, searching around for the gem. There was a muffled giggle and he caught sight of the tips of her pink pigtails against the wall “Spinel! I see you! C’mere!” The cheeky Gem poked her head up from behind the sofa with a chuckle. “Say whaaat?!" Steven gaped at her, scrambling over and looking up and down the couch pressed flat against the wall. Not flat enough. "How on Earth did you even fit behind there?” He planted his eye against the gap “There's barely enough room to post a letter back there.”

She peeled away from the wall and leant forward, her body flat as a pancake. She folded her head backwards to address him with a grin. “It’s a talent." Spinel said "You ever play hide and seek here? You’ve probably forgotten how, but I can show you.”

“Hey, I can play hide and seek just as well as you can balance a paint can above a door.”

  
Spinel giggled and extended her neck to take a look around. “Hey Steven! Is that a new TV? Because this” Spinel jabbed her thumbs at herself “is Pay-per view!” She bugged her eyes out and spun them around with a giggle, getting one out from Steven too.

  
“Oh you’re so funny Spinel.” He tugged her the rest of the way out of her hiding place and tried to give her a hug but she wobbled out the way.

  
“Woah woah woah stand back Steven." She ran her fingers around the edge of her 2D form. "When I’m looking this sharp you have to be careful, or you might get a paper cut!” She puffed at her thumb, popping back to her usual self.  
"Ah," Steven countered “but wouldn’t that make it...” he took a running leap towards her " arrrt!"  
Spinel’s eyes widened as his pink covered body filled her view. “Oh paint.” She managed before they collided, tumbling over and sliding across the floor in a pink streak.  
“Hahaha!” Steven poked pink dots here and there all over Spinel, before booping her on the nose “Got you.”  
Spinel sat up in silence, looked down at herself then at Steven. Her bottom lip began to wobble.“Oh no, no I didn’t mean to-” Steven began to backtrack.  
“Ah hahaha!” Spinel doubled over, smacking her hand against the floor, spattering the paint even further “Got you!”  
“Oh, Oh, yeah!” Steven started laughing and Spinel joined him, laughing together.

By the kitchen Amethyst snuck her head above the counter, edging her mobile into range. Garnet held her back.  
“Not yet.”  
“but they look ridiculous? What could possibly be mmmh?” Garnet pulled her fellow gem back, stopping her from spoiling the moment, waiting for the warp pad to activate. It chimed and a bright light filled the room.  
“Now.”  
The light flared out to reveal Pearl, a wicker basket hooked neatly over her arm. “I’m baaa-aack,” she trilled “and -”  
“PEARL! Watch out it’s-”  
“-I made sure to get the biggest eggs-ah!” Pearl had taken one step off the podium and her feet flew out from under her, letting out a squawk as she slipped, the basket flying up into the air above her head. She landed with a splat in the puddle of paint, watching as the eggs paused at the top of their flight, gracefully tumbling over before gravity took notice once more.  
“Noooooo!” Steven scrambled towards her, managing a sliding half dive in time to encase the both of them in a bubble against which the eggs splattered harmlessly.

“Ahhhhhhaaaagh!” Pearl layed wide eyed against the bubble taking her breaths in short sharp gasps. Behind her through the hazy pink surface Steven could see Amethyst rolling about on the floor, absolutely howling with laughter. Garnet, from the safety of the kitchen counter was observing proceedings with a small smile. “Steven! Are you okay?” Pearl seemed to have recovered from the shock and was immediately fussing over him “Are you hurt? Where are you bleeding? Who did this to you?”  
“Pearl! It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s just paint.”  
“Oh, right.” She studied a sample of the pink stuff on the tips of her fingers, her eyes narrowing. “Paint.” One of the egg yolks slid off the side of the bubble to land on the floor with a splat and they both looked up, watching the gloopy eggy mess creep across the surface above their heads.  
Steven let out a weak laugh. “I should probably get us to the carwash, or- or the ocean to clean that off.” Steven tried to pull Pearl to her feet, having to grip extra tight to hold onto her through the paint. “Come on.” Pearl gave a short sharp nod and they started pushing the bubble towards the door.

Or rather they tried. The bubble just slid underneath them as they tried to move, failing to gain traction on the increasingly slippery surface. Steven picked up the pace in an effort to overcome it, forcing Pearl to keep up and the bubble span faster and faster until he slipped, crashing into Pearl and spinning around in the bubble in a tangled heap until it popped and they were both spat out on the floor. Pearl let out a groan.  
“Pearl?” Steven asked with trepidation. She sat up without a word, staring into the distance. “Are you okay?”  
Pearl looked at her hands, covered in paint and tensed as egg dripped down her gem. Amethyst was on the floor, still gasping in silent laughter. Garnet gave her a thumbs up. "Oh, well, you got me!” Pearl threw her hands up and forced a laugh “I suppose it was a textbook ambush. This is meant to be your training day after all. It seems Amethyst has even been teaching you a few tricks, although I expected better from you Garnet.”  
“I had nothing to do with this.” Garnet said stoically.  
“Oh really?” Pearl scolded, plucking a fragment of egg shell off her arm. At least Garnet had the decency to blush. “Well Steven this is all” she waved at the paint covered house, letting out a strangled noise as the carnage became apparent. “Quite the prank.”  
“Actually Spinel got me first.” Steven explained as he helped pull her to her feet, trying not to wince as she gripped his hand a little too hard.  
“Really.” Her angry tirade was waylaid by a pointed cough. Garnet was waving her hand over and over. Oh she wished they hadn’t come up with these Steven- proof hand signals. ‘Roll with it’. Really! “Really.” Pearl glared at the small gem peeking out from behind Steven, and drew herself up to her full height, hands on her hips. “So you got the jump on Steven, used surprise to gain the tactical advantage? Well, I’m not so easily surprised! You think you can take me?” Pearl crouched into a fighting stance with a karate cry, sweeping her hands through the air to mark two streaks of warpaint across her cheeks. “Let’s see how long you two last in face to face combat. First paint wins.”

A few minutes later Spinel and Steven lay tangled on top of each other, covered in even more paint than before and both laughing. Pearl pondered her hands, still covered in the stuff and wiped them back over her hair, turning it bright pink. “How do I look?”  
“It really suits you.” Steven said, looking up at her smiling from ear to ear. “and it’s good to see you too Spinel. What brings you here?”  
Her laughter faded as she watched Pearl shriek at the amount of pink paint that had gotten over her. “Well, actually… that. There’s someone back on home-world I think you need to come talk to.”  
“I’m gonna need another shower first.”

Pearl studied her reflection in the window.  
“Go with them.” Garnet appeared at her shoulder. “Steven will have questions. Amethyst and I will tidy up here.”  
“Whaaat?” cried Amethyst in the background “That wasn’t part of the deal!”  
“Garnet, I-” Pearl started but Garnet held up a hand, putting a stop to her protest too.  
“You also need to shower.”

Pearl rested a hand on Stevens shoulder as they sped through the warp. "You're quieter than usual."  
"I just- Pink Pearl.” Steven rolled around to face Pearl and Spinel “Pink Diamond used to know her, but I've only ever had fragments of those memories. I guess I don't know if I know her well enough to help. We don't even know what White did to her." Steven touched his face, tracing unseen cracks.  
Pearl bit her lip, saved as Spinel jumped in."I'm sure you'll think of something."  
"What if I can't? Spinel, do you really want me to do this?"  
"Are you crazy?" Spinel laughed "I wouldn't have asked if I thought you couldn't."  
“Oh come on, this is what you do Steven." Pearl tried to boost his spirits "How many gems have you talked out of destroying Earth now?”  
"I count at least four." Spinel held up her hand, and shaped her arm into a number four.  
“See? You’ve got this Steven.”  
“But this… it’s not like that. I'm not even sure where I'd start."  
I don’t know either. Pearl thought. If I knew, I’d have talked to her myself.

They arrived in a squat grey bunker, empty apart from Pink Pearl who was leant over an electronic screen, studying the results that flashed up on it.  
BOOM  
All of them were launched into the air briefly as the ground shook around them.  
"WHAT IS THAT?" Steven shouted.  
Pink Pearl leapt around with a start, glancing between Spinel and the others, eyes widening as she realised who her guests were. She looked in horror at Spinel who had a big stupid grin plastered all over her face.  
" " Spinel explained to Steven.  
"WHAT?"  
"There's no need to shout Steven." Pearl brushed the dust off her jacket. “We’re right next to you.”  
"WHAAAT?" Steven yelled again his ears ringing . Spinel was waving as she talked animatedly to Pink Pearl, gesturing towards him several times, Pearl watched her, jaw dropping floorwards as she explained. He shook his head to clear it, then licked his fingers and stuck them in his ears, the sound level coming back as they healed.  
"The Diamonds…?" Pearl muttered in disbelief her face buried in her hand.  
"Are arm wrestling!” Spinel announced with glee, puffing her chest up. “I had to think of something to keep them busy. What's the score Pinkie?"  
Pink Pearl blushed. "Yellow 4, Blue 5."  
"Huh, you go Blue.” Steven looked around “What about White Diamond, where’s she?"  
"Refereeing."  
"Oh man, I bet Amethyst would love to see that!" Steven tried to peer out of the window, but only a pink dust-cloud was visible.  
"Ahem, Steven." Pearl brought him back to the matter at hand.  
"Right." He racked his brains, trying to figure out how to broach the subject.  
"Shall I let the Diamonds know you are here Steven?" Pink Pearl broke his train of thoughts with a start.  
"No! Nononono,” He waved his hands, “don’t tell them we’re here. We're not here to see them.” He paused “Actually we’re not here for them, at all.”  
"Very well." She withdrew her hand away from the screen.  
"We came here for you!” Steve announced, with a flourish.  
“Me?” Pink Pearl took half a step back from the abruptly cheerful Steven.  
“Yeah! I, we wanted to see how you were doing, catch up on stuff, check everything's okay for you here.” There was a silence. He looked around, Pearl avoiding his gaze, instead fixated on something on a nearby screen.  
He looked. It was blank.  
“Soo, how have you been?”  
"Er, fine.” Pink Pearl glanced between the other two and back to Steven, frozen in place.  
“Right! Good. So, um... what have you been up to?”  
“I have been on home world catching up on the last eight thousand years, and getting accustomed to the changes you've been bringing in over the last two along with everybody else.”  
“Right, of course. Getting back into the swing of things! Good, that’s good.”

BOOM!

Pink Pearl turned away, grateful of the distraction and chalked up another win for Blue. Steven cursed. This wasn’t going how he’d hoped. “Is everything okay for you here?  
“Yes.” She looked around, then turned back to her screen. “Is there anything else you require of me? I have matters to attend to.”  
“I guess not.” Steven turned and took a few steps towards the warp pad."Wait, no.” He turned back “Pink, you disappeared after my return. Where were you? What happened to you?”  
Pink stiffened. “Like I said, I was catching up.”  
“Hold on, nearly eight thousand years away, eight thousand years of not being yourself, eight thousand years of change and you’re telling me you’re okay with it all just like that?”  
“Yes.”  
“I don’t believe that.”  
“Why not?” She took a step towards him. “You have proved gems can change. You have changed as much in these last two years as in many thousands before them. I have found my way well enough.”  
“Are you really okay?”  
“Why does it suddenly matter to you?”  
“Well actually...” Spinel started and withdrew under the glare she earnt.  
“I remember you from before.”  
“What? How is that possible?” Pink Pearl furrowed her brow “you’re not-”  
“But I have some of her memories. Not many of them but enough to know you did so much for her, you were so kind to her, and with what you’ve been through, the least I could do is return that kindness.” She walked away from him. “I want to return that kindness.”  
He watched her uncertain if he had overstepped the mark. Pink Pearl stood her hand almost out of sight as she clenched and unclenched it, staring out beyond the window. Had he managed to get through to her? He moved round, trying to get closer, trying to get into view. “So what do you say?”  
“No.”  
“What?”  
“That will not be necessary.” Pink Pearl waved at the bunker. “I am fine here. I appreciate your concern but it is unfounded. I have a life here. It is enough.”  
“But if you’re not happy-”  
“I’m fine!”  
“We can make it better, we can help!”  
“I don’t need help, I am fine.”  
“Stop holding back on me- just let me help you!”  
“You think I need help.” Pink didn’t snap, but Steven stopped. “I already said no.” Steven’s face fell as the realised the crudeness of what he had just said. “Do you think I’m not capable of looking after myself?”  
“No, no, I din’t mean that at all, I’m sorry.” Steven tried showing his remorse. “What I mean to say is if there’s anything you need, anything I could do for you, just let me know.”  
“Like what?”  
"I, I could heal that for you!" he waved at her eye "I have healing powers!"  
"That will not be necessary"  
"Oh it's fine if you want to take some time to think about it,"  
"That will not be necessary."  
“I could fix-”  
“I don’t need to be fixed!” Pink Pearl brought her hands down, smashing the screen before her.  
“But-” he reached out, stepping forward.  
“Steven-” Pearl warned, as wet drops began to spot the broken screen.  
“I don’t-” Pink Pearls voice cracked as she retreated away from him.  
“Wait!” Steven tried to stop her, but was pushed back as a white sphere bubbled up put of the floor.

Pink dove straight on the opportune distraction. "Ah, my Diamond requires my presence."  
"Wait, what?” Steven said aghast. “You're serving White again?!"  
Pink Pearl paused and turned, flashing the full force of her scars to fix her eye on them. "My purpose is to serve my Diamond. White Diamond requires a Pearl. It's not as though there are any others."  
"But she had you under her control for all that time!"  
"White Diamond chose me to spread her radiance."  
"But what about you? Did you get a choice in this? Do you care about this?"  
"Pearls serve." She glanced to Pearl "I am happy to fulfill my purpose. As far as the time I spent under White Diamonds command goes I have no memory of it, so it is of no issue to me. There are much worse things a gem can suffer."  
"Like that?" Steven tapped his eye.  
"No. Now if you will excuse me Pink-" she stopped, catching herself "-Steven, my Diamond requires my presence." She saluted him with a diamond and stepped into the bubble, quickly disappearing into the floor, Spinel reaching after her.  
Steven sighed, looking downcast. "Let's go."

They resurfaced in Pinks old garden. It was looking worse than ever, but at least it was quiet.  
Pearl was immediately by his side. “Steven, at least you tried.”  
"She was my Pearl, but I hardly know her." Steven groaned. “What was I thinking?”  
“You were trying to help.” Pearl pointed out. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Besides she was Pink Diamond's Pearl. Not yours.”  
Steven didn’t answer, watching as Spinel stepped out past them into the garden proper. She was very quiet, her head hanging low.  
“Spinel, I’m sorry.” Steven looked around, and hurried to her side as he realised she was crying again. “No no no, don’t cry!” He tried to wipe up the tears on her face.  
“Sorry,” Spinel sniffled “I can’t help it. I just wanted her to be happy.” Steven drew her in in a comforting hug, letting his jacket soak them up. He looked around and realised they were right in the centre of the garden, directly on top of where Spinel had stood for all those years. Pearl was looking around in horror at the wilted flowers, her hands clasped together. Of course, this was probably the first time she’d been here since before then too.

Steven broke the question. “Why did you bring us back here?”  
“You don't understand, I just wanted to help her feel better.” Spinel waved. “When I saw her, after everything on Earth I…” she stuttered off.  
“It’s okay, go on,” Steven encouraged her, holding her hands. She pulled away.  
“No, no. You’ll think I’m a fool.”  
“No I won’t. It’s okay to want to help someone.”  
“But I shouldn’t feel like this.” She held out her hands “Why do I feel so happy when she’s not?” Spinel began to sing.

‘I left to start a new life,  
I didn't think this would happen so soon,  
I had no idea what I'd find  
When I came here...

I found a Pearl, lost and alone  
Without any friends, trying to find a new home  
I found a Pearl standing beside them  
After trawling long years down where no-one could find her

Oh, I never thought it could hurt so well,  
For my heart to reach out so  
To see another so sad  
When I found a Pearl

I found a Pearl, who I came to believe  
She'd loved and lost, just like me,  
I found a Pearl, who I wanted to show  
It's okay to be happy, and okay to let go

Oh, I never thought it could hurt so well,  
For my heart to reach out so  
To see another so sad  
When I found a Pearl

I found a Pearl, I reached out a hand  
But she pulled away, said I "don't understand"  
I found a Pearl, all I want her to be  
Is happy, joyful and free again

Oh if only we could change our lives,  
Take away the yesterdays  
The years that fade away  
Wash away the wrong, start all over again.  
Make everything right again.

I found a Pearl full of self doubt  
Questions and fear, but won't ask for help  
I found a Pearl, hiding a smile  
That would light up her face, make it worthwhile

Oh, I never thought it could hurt so well,  
For my heart to sing for you,  
I remember the way you helped me,  
I want to help her too,

I found a Pearl who couldn't see  
That she'd knocked my breath out with her grace and beauty

Oh, I never thought it could hurt so well,  
For my heart to sing for you,  
I remember the way you helped me,  
I want to help her too,  
I want to help her too!

I found a Pearl  
All I want her to be  
Is happy, joyful  
And free.’

Steven tugged at Pearls sleeve as Spinel finished her mournful tune, his eyes brimming with tears. “We have to help her.”  
“But how?” Pearl asked. “She already told us to leave her be.” Steven seemed to consider, drumming his fingers against his folded arms.  
“Why don’t you talk to her?”  
“Steven, that’s… not a good idea.” Pearl shied away from him.  
“Why not? You both served Pink Diamond, you both knew her! You can reminisce about the good old days!”  
Pearl laughed, a short sharp bark that was quite unlike her. _Good old days_. “Look, I replaced her.” Pearl took a deep breath “I-” Her hands flew to her mouth and she grimaced, pulling them away. “I don’t think she wants to talk to me. I shouldn’t have come.”  
“I don’t believe that for a second. Come on Pearl! Garnet wouldn’t have sent you if you weren’t able to help in some way. She knows you knew Pink Pearl, she knew you could help!”  
“Steven, there are a lot reasons Garnet could have wanted me to come. Not least that my being away it gives them time to try and clean up the mess they made. ” Pearl pointed out “Besides, I never really knew her. When I came to be by Pink Diamonds side, she was already under White’s control.”  
“I understand." Steven said "Buuut we still need to know more about her. Who else knew her before, when she was still herself?” Steven considered it. “What about the other Pearls?”  
Pearl shook her head. “No. Blue and Yellow are too young, and none of the others were around the Diamonds enough to really know her.”  
“Pink Diamond! Oh," Steven scuffed the floor. That was a non-starter. "If only there was some way I could get her memories, we could learn everything we needed!" he tapped at his gem and looked over to Spinel. Something like that would have saved them a few other troubles too, he thought. Spinel looked around with a huh? Steven sighed and massaged his forehead. “What about the other Diamonds?” he pondered “Blue, White?”  
Pearl let out a hmpf. “They would hardly be interested in the fate of a Pearl. Also it would not be a good idea, all things considered.”  
“Like what? What things?” Steven perked up. "Pearl, do you know what happened to her?" Spinel peered over his shoulder and Pearl paused glancing between the two of them and at her clasping hands. She gave the slightest of inclinations of her head, her hands flew to her mouth, that involuntary signal of censorship confirming Steven’s suspicions. "You do know!"  
She dragged her hand away "I can't tell you."  
"But you know. You know why she became White’s Pearl.” Steven watched Pearl’s face flush. “You know how she got broken.” Pearl flinched. A terrible thought hit him "P- Pink didn't break her did she?" He didn’t think he could stomach the thought of a memory like that.  
"Of course not Steven." She reassured him "Pink would never have hurt her Pearl like that." Her stomach lurched as an unwelcome memory surfaced, and Steven scrutinised her.  
“But you do know. Hmm” Pearl’s hands were back up. He was going to have to be careful "So it was White, or one of the other-"Pearl had blinked. He paused and then she very deliberately blinked again. "White did that to her? But why?" Pearl had a pained look on her face.  
"Steven please, you know I want to tell you, I really want to help you with this but I can't say.” Pearl shut her eyes, wrapping her arms around herself. Once again she was caught by the Diamonds, caught by their rules, their secrets… All those years of rebellion and she still found herself under their rule. “Why can’t I just talk?” She turned from him “Steven, I want to help but it’s not my choice. The Diamonds...” She clung on even tighter, fingers, digging in “Each time I have to watch others hurting knowing I could do something about it and I can’t, just because the-” she stopped, and her voice dropped, quiet, level, direct. “They told me to.” She almost hissed “I’m tired of secrets.” There was a sharp edge to her voice that Steven hadn’t heard before.  
“Pearl?” Steven approached her carefully. He’d never seen her like this “Are you okay?” She shook her head.  
“I could use a hug.”  
Steven was surprised. She’d never asked for this kind of physical contact before, but he obliged wholeheartedly.  
“You too Spinel.” Pearl added. Steven’s eyes snapped open, Spinel looked to for confirmation of Pearls’ strange request. Steven looked up at Pearl. She was staring past him, a grim look of determination set upon her face.  
Oh.  
He knew that look. “Pearl, what are you-”  
“No more secrets.” Pearl declared “I won’t let them have me forever. I got around it before. If I can do this… Please,” Steven gave her a quick reassuring squeeze and clung on harder. Spinel snaked her arms around them both, holding them all together. Steven braced himself.

“I was there.” The effect was almost instantaneous, an involuntary reflex, Pearls arms flexing against them forcing them to hang on even tighter. She strained with the effort, trying to break through the programming and tell the truth.  
“You can do this.” Steven whispered.  
Sweat appeared on Pearls brow, her words short as her body fought against them. “I had just been made when White-” Pearl convulsed, flaring out into a white light.  
“Pearl!” They had to let go as she fell apart in their arms, the almost liquid discorporation collapsing to the floor in a puddle where she flowed about over herself a faded pale light. After an anxious moment, she reformed back into herself, left lying on the ground panting heavily with the effort and looking rather worse for wear. Steven almost collided with her as he went to help her up, the two of them meeting halfway as she shoved herself unsteadily to her feet. Steven intervened “Woah, it’s alright, take it easy.”

“No, it’s not alright." She leaned on him, half of a mind to use her spear to prop herself up instead. "This shouldn’t be happening.”  
“It’s okay, you tried.” Steven hugged her, for real this time. “Please don’t do that to yourself again.”  
“White.” Pearl started and Steven clung on. He wanted to tell her, shout at her to stop, but she was still trying, trying to tell him something she knew. “You need to know.” Pearl took hold of his shoulders and moved him back, looking him in the eyes as she spoke slowly and clearly.

“There’s another way. Steven, I can’t disobey a direct order from a Diamond.”  
Steven looked around as Pearl held onto him. What was she after? This was getting uncomfortable. He squirmed a little and felt his gem shift. Pearl glanced down and then pointedly at Steven.

oh.

“Me?” Steven whispered. “But I’m not...”  
“You have a diamond.” Pearl said. He tried to pull away but she held on, her eyes begging with him to stay. Would that even work?  
“I dunno Pearl, it seems a little… I’m still no Diamond. I’m not even a full gem!”  
“We have to try. Please,” she stepped back, and held her hands up, hand in her palm “I don’t want to live behind this any more.”  
“If you’re sure...” She gave him a determined nod. He pulled himself together. “Pearl,” he said with confidence “could you tell me what happened to Pink Pearl?”  
Pearl sighed, almost rolling her eyes. "I could but I can’t.” She wiggled her eyebrows and put on an impatient forced smile. He needed to try something different, and he stood for a moment, carefully thinking about it.

“Pearl, tell me about what happened to Pink Pearl.”  
Pearl straightened up, her hands coming together instinctively. “Well White Diamond-” Pearl paused, watching her hands waiting for them to respond of their own accord once more, wafting them away with a smile as it didn’t come “White Diamond ordered me not to reveal any of this, but I was there when it happened. I was there when White took control of Pink’s Pearl.” Pearl gazed in disbelief at herself. It was working! “It was terrible.”

"It happened back right at the beginning. I had just been made, tailored specifically for Pink Diamond,” Pearl focused, a blue light issuing from her gem, flooding the area with her memories.

"My Diamonds it is an honour to serve.” A younger Pearl stepped forward, fresh faced and smiling she saluted the assembled Diamonds. “But, where is my Diamond?" Pearl looked around, searching expectantly. “Where is Pink Diamond?”  
“You will be joining her shortly.” White Diamond confirmed. “However we have some business I wish you to witness first.”  
“Very good My Diamond.” Pearl saluted and stood back. The room went dark bar a spot of brightness in the middle, plunging Steven into shadows but he squinted and focused on the scene before him.  
“Send her in.”  
A white bubble came up through the floor and opened, depositing a shaking pearl on the floor. Pink Pearl!  
She scrambled to her feet and quickly saluted White. "White Diamond, I, I-"  
“Silence.” The whole room went quiet, everybody's attention focused on the Diamond that towered over the Pearl. “You. You thought we couldn’t see what you were doing, but we do. Do you think that anything escapes our notice? You have been leading Pink Diamond astray, sowing the seeds of imperfect thoughts in her mind, promoting behaviour unbecoming of a Gem of her status, and sowing discord among us. You have even turned her against us! Your actions have been destabilising the Empire. It is little more than Treason. How flawed are you to try and corrupt a Diamond?”  
“No, I was only trying to serve her,” Pink Pearl tried to explain herself.  
“You are faulty!”  
“I only ever followed her wishes, please talk to her, ask her, My Diamond!”  
“You are flawed!”  
“I was only trying to help her!”  
“So you admit your crimes?”  
“No, I, I,” The Pearl flung herself on the floor “please! Ask Pink, she can-”  
“She is YOUR DIAMOND!” The room rattled with the thunder of Whites voice.

“Stand.”

Pink Pearl stood, and froze, Steven blinking away as everything stopped, the whole scene jittering in place. Steven looked to Pearl who stood tears flowing from her. “I’m sorry!” she said. “I… thought I was strong enough.”  
“Pearl, what happened next?” Steven asked. Pearl had frozen in front of him, a look of terror plastered across her face. He stopped her hands as they came up, and they yielded as he pushed them down again. “Whatever it is, you can tell me, you can show me.”  
“You’ll hate me too.”  
“What? I could never hate you. What are you talking about?” Steven glanced back at the holographic Pink Pearl behind them.  
“She does.” The scene jumped around them, changing.  
Steven looked around in surprise as everybody shifted “Wait, no. Pearl, I can’t let you do this. You said no more secrets.” She looked away but gave him a curt nod.  
“Please,” Pearl brushed away a tear. “I was a freshly minted Gem, I didn’t know any better.”

White’s voice brought Steven back to the holo-memory.

“Pearl.”  
“My-” White Diamond cut off Pink Pearl with a finger, beckoning the new Pearl forward. She stepped into the light.  
“Yes my Diamond?”  
“Tell me, what is the punishment for traitors?”  
“Shattering, My Diamond!” holo-Pearl declared in a sing-song voice and saluted White Diamond with a happy little smile edging onto her face.

The picture flickered out, and Pearl looked away, eyes shut, waiting for the anger. She jumped as a hand landed on her shoulder.  
“Pearl, it wasn’t your fault.” Steven comforted her. “So why wasn’t she shattered?” Stevens hand flew to his face “Is that what that was?”  
“No. She gave her a chance to confess before White. I think White was going to just reset her make an example of her like that, but then…"  
"What happened?"  
"She defied her.” Pearl sounded a little in awe, and once again the holo-images flickered into life.

“You are guilty beyond doubt Pearl,” White Diamond declared “and the usual punishment for your crimes is shattering. But your flaws... I can fix them for you.”  
“No,”  
“Everything that troubles you will be wiped away”  
“Wait please!”  
“Your gem preserved, improved, Perfected”  
“NO!” The Pink Pearl cried, “I don't need to be fixed!”

Steven’s eyes widened “Oh.”

Pink Pearls outburst had left the whole court looking at her in horror. She gasped, hands over her mouth willing the words away but it was too late.  
White was silent, lips pinned shut in fury as she looked down on this disrespectful Pearl.

With little warning White’s eyes glowed and a bright beam crashed down cracking the floor even as Pink Pearl tried to throw herself out of the way, the strike clipping her with a sharp sound. She crumpled to the ground.  
At the side of the room Steven tried to peer closer, and watched as Pink slowly sat up on her knees, head in her hands, tears dripping through her fingers.

“Pearl.”

Pink looked away from the Diamonds, and Steven gasped. The side of her face had shattered, a mosaic of glowing white cracks crawling through the dead glass of her left eye, all the colour drained from her body around it.

“Look at me,”  
"No-"  
“Look at Me Pearl.”  
The compulsion was strong, even Steven was drawn to obey. He almost missed Pink Pearl reaching for her gem before she disappeared, buried in another beam of bright white light, that bore down upon her, stripping away her own colour until nothing was left. The light faded until only the fallen body of Pink Pearl remained, colourless and whimpering on the floor. A spectral hand waved above her and she rose, not stood but floating unnaturally in front of them arms raised, her eye glowing, her expression fixing into a smile. The glow faded a little and she spoke.  
“See? Isn’t that so much better for everyone!” White’s voice ushered from her as she turned, fixing her one good eye on them, and for the first time, holo-Pearl’s smile faltered. The scene flickered out.

"White overpowered her before she could discorporate, turning her into her puppet, keeping her trapped like that for all those years.”  
"That's terrible." Steven looked forlorn.  
“White forbade me from speaking of it to anyone. The first secret I ever had to keep, and the worst. Not even Pink Diamond knew I had been there.” Pearl closed her eyes and exhaled.  
"I had to replace her, living as though nothing had happened. It wasn’t easy. Pink wasn't keen on me to start with. She didn’t trust me. She was so upset at the loss of her Pearl, heartbroken and angry at her fate… I tried to fill the gaps but never quite could. It took-" Pearl hesitated "quite a while before she forgave me, and I don’t blame her for it. I was little more than White’s lackey. That’s why pink Pearl wants nothing to do with me. She remembers what happened, what I did as if it were only two, not thousands of years ago. I don’t blame her for hating me. If I was in her position, I’d think I was heartless too.”  
“But that was hardly you! You’ve changed so much since then. If you were really heartless, you wouldn’t care so much, and you care so, so much. Just look at you! Look at all this you’re doing.” Pearl stayed silent, her heart swelling with pride in the young gem, tears threatening to brim over as he wrapped her in another hug.  
“Perhaps we just need to change her mind.” Steven pondered.”But how?”

Pearl sighed. “I’m sorry Steven, I thought this would give more answers than questions. I thought this would hel-ahhhH!" Pearl doubled over, clutching her chest.  
"Pearl? What's wrong?"  
"Oh, I'm sure it's nothing.” She put on a smile and waved him away “Just indigestion or something."

"Pearl. You don't eat."  
"Oh yes, silly me! Haha ha!" She let out another cry of pain and collapsed to her knees, Steven by her side in an instant.  
"Pearl talk to me, what's happening to you?"  
"I don't know. Ahhh!" Her fingers clenched, and Steven pulled her hand away to reveal the discoloured patch beneath, holding on as she let out another cry as it stretched out, bleaching away more colour as it ate across her.  
"What is that, some kind of Gem allergy? Are you allergic to something in here? Gem wasp sting? Poison ivyshard?"  
"Steven, it's not-hnnnrgh!" She curled over willing the pain to pass "Gems don't get allergies."  
Spinel shrugged "I have no idea what that is." Pearl tensed up as the pain came again, the discolouration spreading.  
"Hold on," He pulled Pearl upright, broadly licked his hand and planted it squarely in her midriff. She shuddered. There was a pause and she dared open her eyes.

The pain hit her like a sledgehammer this time, whiting out everything else until Stevens desperate shouting brought her back. "Pearl please, stay with me."  
“She doesn't look too good." Spinel said. The strange affliction had been busy spreading, white pinpricks sprouting all over her body and growing, blotchy snowflakes expanding and linking together. Pearls whole body was mottled white now, less colour than not.

Pearl summoned all her strength to push herself up from all fours but her limbs were against her, the effort leaving her shaking like a leaf. "Steven,"  
"It didn't work Pearl, my powers..." He helped her sit up again letting her lean against him.  
"It's okay. I'll just discorporate out." She put on a smile for him. "Be back in no time."  
"Don't take too long on me." Steven quipped even as he felt Pearl tense up again, the strange bleaching creeping further, covering so much of her body now. It had spread so quickly "Or who knows what sort of mess the house will be in when you get back."  
"I think" Pearl forced out through gritted teeth "I'll keep the jacket. I liked that." She closed her eyes and focused. Her gem glowed,

And fizzed out.

"Pearl!" Her eyes snapped open "Your gem!" It had gone a dull white, all of it's usual lustre gone.  
"Steven, it's" The strange infection was on the move again filling out the remaining gaps, the last streaks of colour finally disappearing from her hair. Her arms dropped loose, voice barely coming out as a whisper, her eyes glazing over as she tried to focus on him. "Worse…"  
"Come on," he pulled her arm over his shoulders and lifted her pale form to her feet "We'll get you to the others. They'll know what to do." Spinel joined him on the other side, propping her up. They tried taking a step, but she wouldn't budge. "Come on Spinel, pull your weight."  
“I am!" They gave another heave, tumbling forward in unison as the weight left their backs.

Steven turned to see Pearl stood there unnaturally pale and unmoving her face in shadows arms flung forward where she had thrown them. Her head lolled around and she started straightening slowly. Steven called out to her but her blank reflective eyes paid no heed, staring beyond them. Her arms raised up, palms to the stars, head tilted just up and stopped, stood ramrod straight and still.

“Pearl? Pearl, Pearl!” Steven stepped up and tentatively reached out, flinching as his fingertips her cold hard unmoving surface. He looked to Spinel.  
"She's stone."


	2. White Pearl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team get together to try and help Pearl.

Amethyst threw the last of the paint stained cushions into a pile with a huff. She eyed the temple door. Well, no one else was around. She hefted the first one, pulled it back over her shoulder and launched it, muttering darkly as it hit wide of the door-frame. The second one followed, this time flying straight, but catching the top of the door. The third sailed through, landing in the back of her room with a satisfying thump. "Aww yeass, hole in one! You go Amethyst." She did a little victory dance and picked up the final few cushions, eagerly launching them through the air. The warp pad flared, and Garnet fielded the flying furniture neatly.

"Garnet, Uh! I was tidying."

"That can wait. We have a mission."

"Really? What about Pearl and Steven?"

"No. There will be time to finish cleaning the house later."

"Woah, hey there I am not gonna start complaining about an excuse to ditch this gig." Amethyst leapt onto the pad "so what is it? Angry monsters terrorising a human village? Lovestruck rivals battling each other in Little home world?” Amethyst gasped “Did the home world gems hide another superweapon on Earth that we gotta diffuse to save the day?"

Amethyst watched as Garnet considered. "No." Garnet decided "Nothing that exciting."

"Aww. Did Greg get his hand stuck in the toaster again?"

"Also no."

“So where are we going?" They disappeared in a flash.

The cottage sat silently for a few minutes, then the warp pad glowed once more, revealing Spinel. "Garnet! Amethyst! Are you home? Anybody hoooome? Hmm.” She looked around. “Maybe they didn’t hear me.” She poofed out a one man marching band, stomping up and down in front of the temple door, calling them, but with no reply to that either she returned to the centre of the room, wondering where they could be.

The warp trail resolved itself into musty half light of an old stone temple. Amethyst scuffed the dirt with her toe, shifting a thick layer of dust and dirt to reveal firm marble below.

"Eeesh, this place belongs in the dark a-ahtchoo!" The sound echoed up and down the corridor they were in.

"Come on."

"Are you sure? This looks like just the sort of place some creepy gem monster would live, hiding in the shadows, creeping out of the cracks in the walls to get you!"

“Amethyst, focus.”

Amethyst groaned. Something rattled behind her. She looked back, flinching as she thought she saw some movement come from the walls, hurrying onwards through the shadows to keep up with Garnet as she strode away. "Ah!" Amethyst leapt sidewards bouncing off the rock steady form of Garnet scrabbling to hold onto her as a grasping figure loomed out at them. She peeked. Their ambusher was still, unmoving, the outstretched arm missing a hand, stone flakes decorating the floor around their feet. The head of the statue was missing too, the elegant lines of a flowing dress just about standing out from the decay. "Well that's creepy." Amethyst took a closer look and shifted to mimic the statue, clomping after Garnet "Gar-neeet, I am the ghost of statues paaaaast. WooOOooo!"  
Garnet ignored her, considering a shadowed archway up ahead of them, a cloister of pillars leading out into the darkness beyond it. Amethyst pulled a face, but Garnet was already heading in. Taking a second to beef herself up a bit she punched her palm. "Purple Puma ain't afraid of no ghosts."

"There are no ghosts Amethyst."

"Right, only partially disembodied remnants of corrupted and broken gems, or do you think we got them all already? I'm just saying, we should get ready is all."

Garnet went in. "Woah." She said, looking around, and Amethyst echoed her sentiment, and again as her eyes adjusted to the darkness too. Beyond them was a tall hall, a broad cavernous space filled entirely with statues, their pale white forms and blank eyes looming like ghosts out the darkness. "There are so many of them." Garnet waved her hand in front of the nearest one. "No one home."

"Of course not, they're just statues right?"

"Something isn't right here." She moved on, carefully picking her way deeper into the collection. "Look at them! These statues, they're all..."

"In different poses?" Amethyst shifted through a few.

"No." Garnet leant down, and tapped the outline of a rounded gem set in the naval. "They're all Pearls."

Amethyst gasped dramatically. “Oh no(!)”

“Amethyst!”

“So some gem really liked sculpting Pearls, what's the big deal? Can we go now? I'm gonna miss Beach Runners."

"...and the hunky Blackfold runs in and saves them before they drown, it's practically art." Garnet threw out an arm to stop Amethyst before she could step off the warp pad. "Argh, I just cleaned that!"  
Fresh pink words gleamed where they were daubed across the floor. 'Help! Steven pink garden.'  
Garnet grabbed Amethyst, and with a little 'Hup!' she punched the air launching them into warp, wind rattling past them as they flew through space faster than usual.  
The ground shuddered a little as they arrived, Amethyst taking out the momentum in a tidy roll and they sprinted towards the centre of the garden, weapons ready. In front of them Steven hadn't noticed their arrival, letting out little noises as he danced around a statue, putting in a pirouette and an elegant leap.

"Oh no." Garnet had seen the star. "Steven!"

"Ugh." Amethyst groaned "Not another one of those creepy Pearl statues."

Steven ran to them wrapping Garnet in a hug and she held him tight. "It's okay Steven we're here."

"Where's Pearl?" Amethyst asked. They looked at her, and the statue. "What? Whaaat?!" She paced around her to get a better look, scrambling backwards with a yell as she realised who she was looking at. "But- what? Did some creepy gem monster get her?!”

“No! I, we-” Steven faltered, his eyes welling up with tears.

"Steven, tell us what happened." Garnet encouraged him.

"She was telling us what happened to Pink Pearl, then she started changing, losing all her colour. My powers couldn't stop it, then she couldn't discorporate, then she was a statue. It happened so fast. I tried to heal her, but my powers didn't work. I've tried fusing but that's not working either. Garnet,” Steven’s voice caught.

"Whaaat?” Amethyst said “But your healing powers work great. Maybe they just need a little longer to work.” She clapped him on the back “I reckon if you close your eyes take your time and really focus, that could bring her back."

"I dunno…"

"It's worth a try. I believe in you.”

"You're right." Steven licked his hand and planted it on Pearl, forcing out a constant hum as he focused.

Amethyst pumped the air puffing into Purple Puma. "You can do it Steven!" Her fists grew as she waved them, cheering him on and with a sharp turn she brought them down, socking Garnet out of sight into the bushes and jumping after her. "You knew about this!" Amethyst snarled as she crouched over her.

"No!" Garnet brushed away the broken shards of her visor and looked Amethyst in the eye all three of her eyes brimming with tears, imploring her "I didn't see this."

“What about this morning?"

“That's not- I didn’t see this!” Garnet maintained her plea, hoping her friend would believe her.

A frustrated yell drew their attention and they leapt back out to resume their places. "It's not working!" Steven turned to them full of tears, not noticing as Amethyst pulled some twigs out of Garnets hair before shrinking back down, or that Garnet drew out a fresh visor before she stepping forward.

"Steven," she stood before him, reaching out to him. "Sometimes our power alone is not enough. That's okay. You once healed corrupted gems we thought impossible to save, by ending a war and convincing the Diamonds to work together. We will find a way through this."

Amethyst joined them, placing a hand on his other shoulder. "Together."

They embraced, holding each other tight. Stevens heart raised a little, but he hung onto them a little longer until they pulled away.

Garnet turned to the statue, cupping her face and looking straight into her blank eyes "Pearl, if you're in there we're here. We're going to find a way to fix this. Hold on."

Blue Diamond was studying reports on Aquamarine production when the door slid open and Garnet stepped through.  
"Blue Diamond. Steven requests your presence." She announced formally, even saluting.  
Blue Diamond turned to study her. "Oh, has he come to visit? How delightful. I am quite busy right now but I can meet him in the springs later if he so wishes."  
"He can't meet you later,"  
“Oh, well you’ll have to sort something out with my Pe- assistant”  
A familiar gem bustled over, carrying a tablet officiously and only hesitating a little as she saw Garnet. "Well," Holly Blue Agate tried to ferry the fusion away, swinging around her as she stayed resolutely glued to the spot "Blue Diamond is busy right now, but I will collect you as soon as she is ready. The door is this way."  
"No! He needs to see you NOW!"  
"Now now Garnet,” Blue Diamond chided, “your Ruby is showing." Garnet growled, but Blue Diamond had turned back to her work, the Agate gesturing to the door a forced grin on her face.  
"I'm not done talking." Garnet didn’t move.  
"Well you simply can’t stay,” Holly fretted “I’m afraid Blue Diamonds schedule is very busy today- Thanks to Yellows insistence on reviewing everything during the games, we’re running behind. We can arrange for a meeting later, though how that would fit into Steven’s plans I don’t know. You don’t happen to know his schedule, have an itinerary, perhaps some foresight...?”  
“No, I don’t.”  
"That's a shame. I'll just schedule you in for afternoon."  
"That's not good enough."  
“Well unless someone can tell me when is, I can’t be expected to do anything about it." She frowned. "Oh no," Holly let out a nervous giggle "you're not going to make me talk with that Pearl of his? Oh, of course he's still got a Pearl, she'll know! She should know. I just have to ask her, get this all sorted out, everyone happy, my Diamond happy..."  
"She CAN'’T.” Garnets outburst took the Blue gems by surprise.  
“There’s no need to be rude.”  
"Just listen for a moment! Pearl can’t help. I can't send her down, Steven can't send her over, (not that he orders her around anyway), she can't do anything right now. I'm only here because Pearl is hurt and Steven needs your help" She pointed at Blue Diamond " to fix her."  
“Oh dear,” Blue Diamond came over and crouched beside them, now finally focused on Garnet. “But what about his healing powers?”  
“They didn’t work. He needs your help," she turned her head to the Agate, ever so slightly "if you’re willing to schedule it in.” Garnet turned and stomped away leaving Blue diamond speechless, making it all the way to the warp pad before realising she hadn't been followed, and the two of them were still staring dumbfounded after her. "Pinks old garden," Garnet answered the question they'd forgotten to ask "and if you're going to come you'll need to stop that." She wiped under her visor "We've got enough tears already."

A Topaz investigated the strange sound to find Amethyst scrabbling at the door controls. "Can I help you?"  
"Yeah, how do you do that Diamond introduction bell? I have a message for Yellow from Steven."  
"Oh, this one of those things I gotta do. Hmm." Amethyst waited as the Topaz frowned, muttering under her breath before leaning forward and plodding in a code to the door controls. The door chimed. "Uh Yellow Diamond," Topaz looked cross eyed at her hands as she fumbled them over one another, trying to get them into some semblance of a salute. "Pink uh... Steven has a message for-" Amethyst barged straight past her.  
"Yo Yellow," Amethyst waved to the Diamond "Steven needs your help."  
"This had better be important." Yellow Diamond was lent on the table studying her arm, flexing it this way and that.  
“Just about as important as it gets. Pearl's hurt. He can't heal her. He really tried." Yellow stood.  
"Where?"  
"Pinks old garden."  
"Very well." She strode towards the warp pad and paused, stopping before the hopeful Topaz who had managed to place herself directly in her way having finally managed to contour her hands into a salute, a proud grin plastered across her face. "Topaz," Yellow Diamond paused "Whilst I'm gone could you find out how the repairs are going?"  
"Yes my Diamond!" The floor shuddered a bit as the Topaz jogged away, and Yellow looked to Amethyst once more.  
"The garden? It's been so long..."

"Oh! Oh dear." Blue knelt down near the statue fingertips carefully touching an elbow, coming up against cold hard stone, whilst Yellow stomped around behind her for a better look.  
"Hmm." She crouched down, studying her with interest.  
"So, do you know what's wrong with her?" Steven ventured.  
"Yes.” Yellow Diamond declared. “Although I am surprised that it was still working."  
"What? What is it?”  
"Well all Pearls have a fail safe that would deactivate them if they ever disobeyed a direct order. It helped ensure they kept in line, obeyed their owners, kept their secrets in confidence."  
"Deactivate? No!” Steven cried, clutching his head “I asked her about Pink Pearl. She wasn't meant to say, and now she's a statue!"  
"Why didn't anyone tell us about this?" Amethyst added glancing towards Garnet, who had been stood by Pearl for some time now, hand on her shoulder, the smallest of quivers betraying the tension within.  
"Well,” Yellow Diamond said “I figured hers was broken, what with all the rebellion, and treachery... By all accounts it should have kicked off long before now."  
"Pink was always kind." Blue pointed out. "Even when she was ordering other gems around. You often thought it weak of her."  
"Hmpf."  
"Right." Steven stepped up "We need to undo this. We need to get her back." The Diamonds exchanged a look. "I already tried my healing, but that didn't work, but if we try it together…"  
"We will need White." Blue guided Holly Blue towards the warp pad.  
"Is that necessary? I’m sure we can-"  
"Look at her Yellow. Surely you can see the resemblance."  
Yellow Diamond rolled her eyes. "I remember when we got her Blue."  
"When we made her."  
"Wait, wait wait, you made her?" Steven looked between them, then at Pearl. Didn’t Diamonds always order others to do everything?  
"We all did. Or rather White did. Pearls always were her project. Or used to be." Blue explained.

Yellow settled down and continued "Time came a long while back that White insisted we got Pink a new Pearl, especially if she was going to start taking on any colonies. She seemed to think the current one was leading her astray, distracting her from the importance of her position, encouraging Pink Diamond to indulge in inappropriate and frivolous behaviour. White blamed her for many of Pinks failings. So when it came to a new one we all chipped in, making sure this Pearl would be better for Pink. White selected the best Pearl from the nursery, and together we adjusted the programming making sure she was knowledgeable enough to teach Pink Diamond how things should be done, strong enough to stand up to some of her more ridiculous urges, and with a dedication to being perfect in all things hat we hoped would rub off on you. We even put our own touches to the design."

“‘Touches’?” Blue laughed. “I had to stop you from turning the whole thing yellow.” She waved a hand over the statues head as if brushing the hair back. "We'd never collaborated like that before, certainly not on a gem, but it worked!” Blue gushed, hands to her gem “Pink started growing up, and she wanted a colony, Oh she was so focused on her colony, everything seemed to be going well with this Pearl, even White was thinking we'd finally gotten it right."

"Until she apparently defected to the rebellion after allowing her Diamond to be shattered." Yellow pulled a face "Of course we know now that's not what happened but the point is she still rebelled. White was furious. She had been trying for so long to make them right, to get that perfect Pearl, but there was always something that always went wrong: They always broke in the end. This had been our chance to fix that together."

“There's been barely any new Pearls in years."

"Steven!" White greeted them with a mother's joy "it is so good to see you! How is Earth keeping you?"  
"I need your help to fix Pearl." Steven waved towards the statue.  
"Oh my" she covered her mouth, climbing down to get a closer look, frowning. "That is such a shame. Well, I'm sure we can find you a new one."  
“What?! No!" Stevens head spun "I don’t want a new one, I want this one back!”  
Steven gasped as his vision shifted, suddenly miles away and millennia ago in the palace, a pink glove pointing to another White Pearl, with cracks across her eye. He groaned and clutched his head, gathering himself again. “She’s our friend. She’s family. We need to help her.”  
“Help her? Steven I never really designed this to be… helped.”  
“What do you mean?” Steven stretched his neck as White stood, once again towering above him. A faint rustle behind his ear told him Garnet and Amethyst had joined his side  
“I... We..." White Diamond turned away "What is done is done.” she waved “what else was I supposed to make of it? There was never any use in keeping a defective Pearl, but why waste a good design?” She paused, unaware of the consternation her comments had caused amongst the crystal gems, throwing side-eye at Yellow Diamond instead “A mostly good design. Steven, at least this way you have some… memento.”  
Steven’s face fell. “I want her back." He walked over to her, looking up into the statue's eyes. "This isn’t fair, we were just trying to help! She disobeyed a stupid order because she's kind and brave and caring. This isn't her fault, this isn't even what you believe any more. It should have been left in the past." He hung his head and let his tears fall to the floor, watching them spatter amongst the dust on the ground. "We have to fix this so please, help me put it right.”  
“Steven, I don’t even know if it is possible. I’m not even sure if there’s anything left to bring back.”  
“Please, she’s family. We have to try.”  
"It's never been done before."  
"Neither had a planet full of corrupted gems been healed." Garnet pointed out "there is a first for everything." Steven looked up at them expectantly.

The Diamonds gathered around Pearl. One by one they focused, their glow growing around themselves and reaching out through their arms, wrapping around the statue in a blaze of colour, forcing Amethyst to shield her eyes.

Steven exhaled, and opened his eyes. He took a step back. The colours faded away, and still she stood there, stone cold.  
"It didn't work." Blue Diamond had her hand to her mouth.

"Well we could still get you another-"

"No, NO!" Steven ran towards the warp pad, almost running into Pink Pearl. She stepped back in surprise, reaching out to him even as he launched himself onto the pad and disappeared. Amethyst paid her no attention as she followed, tracking Steven back up to his room on Earth, gently tapping on the door letting herself in and sitting down by his side, putting an arm over him as he sobbed.  
“It's okay to be sad. Sometimes there are things we can't fix, mistakes we can't undo. That happens, even if we spend every day of our lives trying to get things right. I'm always going to be short. You'll always be missing memories from Pink and Rose." Amethyst rapidly changed track as a particularly audible sob came from him "the point is you tried your best to fix it. We know that, I'm sure Pearl knows that too. It wasn't the result we wanted but, we tried."  
Steven surfaced, looking at her, his bottom lip quivering, stopping him from speaking.  
"Yeah, me too." Amethyst wrapped him in a hug. Steven finally spoke.  
“Where's Garnet?"  
"Still at the garden, I think. She should be back soon."  
"No. We shouldn't leave her alone."  
Amethyst nodded. "We should tell the others too."

Back on Homeworld, in the Palace Pink Pearl sighed and waited at the door, suddenly tired. After their attempted intervention earlier she had been on the warpath, steaming through warp ready to give Steven and Pearl an earful for whatever it was they had said to Spinel. She had found the poor gem crying in Pink Diamonds old room, which had informally become theirs, pebbles and all. She had comforted her as best she could, and struggled to get much of any sense out of her. But once she’d heard they’d gone to the Garden! Those clods! What were they thinking taking her there of all places? She was furious.

But all that was gone, fled from her mind the moment she saw Steven in tears, gone when she saw the statue. The Diamonds had all been there, and the way they avoided her salutes and her gaze irked her. She managed to get the story out, that no one had wanted to tell. That she had been the cause of this, whether she wanted to be or not. She wanted to tell them, to yell at them to stop meddling where it wasn't wanted but she held her tongue and left. She had someone more important to look after.

Far away near another Homeworld, Peridot, Bismuth and Lapis stood outside the barn, listening in shock as Amethyst explained what happened.  
"What?” Peridot gaped at Amethyst. “That old thing? I'm surprised it was still working.”  
“Wait, you knew about this?” Amethyst said.  
“Yeah, but I'd assumed hers was broken what with all that treachery and rebellion and stuff. She was pretty insistent on that part when we met. So she's a statue? And even the Diamonds couldn't turn her back? That's, that's..." Peridot faltered "not good."  
"Yellow said it was part of the 'programming'.” Amethyst caught the green gem, stopping her from pacing for a moment “You know about this right? You're always yapping on about it."  
"Know about programming? Ha! Please, what I don't know about it could be written on the back of a microscopic pebble."  
" We need to know if we can undo it."  
"Hmm.” Peridot tapped her chin muttering about subroutines and fail-safes.  
" Can it be done?"  
“We can take a look, but I'm going to need my tools." Amethyst let Peridot disappear to collect a few things.  
"Geesh, wow.” Bismuth ran her hand through her hair. “I mean Pearl's always been a part of the Crystal Gems."  
"Yeah." Amethyst plonked herself down on the step, Bismuth beside her. "Seems kinda lousy. Only this morning we were all laughing, playing, having fun together. Man."  
“Now she’s a statue.” Lapis said, a strange expression on her face. “A statue.” She whispered and giggled nervously.  
Peridot zoomed back down, fielding a trail of tools into a nearby bucket then leaping into place on the warp pad, hovering the whole collection above her head. “Alright time to go save Pearl!” The others joined her but Lapis eyed them on the pad. “Lapis, are you coming?” Peridot noticed her discomfort and stepped forward, leaving Bismuth to catch the bucket with a loud clang that Lapis flinched away from. "It's okay, it's okay- this isn't something that just happens randomly to any gem," Peridot declared " just Pearls! That's probably a good thing otherwise home world would have just petrified us all years ago." Peridot carried on, oblivious to the grimace on Lapis face. "Besides,” her voice softened “us Crystal gems stick together.” She held out a hand and after a moment, Lapis took it letting herself be drawn together and they disappeared in a flash.

"Steven!" He ran over as soon as he saw them and they swept him back towards the scene. Bismuth's mouth was open as she inspected the statue. "Pearl," she half whispered "what have you gotten yourself into now?" She brought out an eyepiece to inspect the stone, batting away an occasional intrusion by Peridot's helper bots she'd already set to task, testing, measuring and recording. Steven tried to talk to them all.

"I think we should take turns to keep her company." Steven started.

"Steven, how do we even know if she's still in there?" Bismuth asked "How can you be sure we're not just looking at a statue?"

"Her gem. It's still there. It's not broken, or shattered. If it's still here then she must be too, right?"

“I don’t know,"

Bismuth took another look at Pearl's pearl, trying to make sure she didn't give away her unease at how cold and lifeless it was. She looked to Garnet instead as Amethyst reprimanded Peridot for being too rough with the statue. "Garnet, what do you see?"

“There are many possibilities at this point. I need more time.”

Steven watched as Peridot worked, ignoring the others for her screens, Pearl stood in the middle of it all, blissfully unaware. At least she looked okay, gazing up at the stars almost serene, a far cry from the pale and shaking Pearl he had held curled in his arms as this thing had taken over her. It had all happened so quickly. He caught sight of another pained face flitting behind, and moved to follow Lapis Lazuli as she fled away to another hidden corner of the garden.  
“Lapis! Lapis, wait up.” She crunched her water wings into tight fists, but turned to face him, tears in her eyes. “What’s wrong?”  
“I shouldn’t be here Steven, I don't know what to do!"  
“That's easy, we just need to talk to her, keep her company, look after her until we get all this sorted out.” Lapis scowled at the ground. She knew that. She knew what he meant. They wouldn't abandon her.  
"I don't know if I can do this,” Lapis looked around “What would I even say?"  
"Well I know it's hard but what did you want to hear?" Lapis looked up, half listening to the babble of voices as the others discussed methods to get Pearl out as she contemplated her answer. Her eyes narrowed.  
"Anyone's voice but hers."  
"Ohhhhh..." Steven kicked himself. Of course. Pearl had kept the mirror filed away in her own gem for so many years, the mirror Lapis has spent so much time trapped in...  
"Now she's stuck and you're all here for her." Lapis forced herself to take a moment, "I shouldn't be here."  
"That's not true. You understand, that can be a huge help!"  
"I don't know Steven, I get that we’re trying to help, and I know I should help, I want to help, but there's a part of me that-" she looked away, quiet "There’s a part of me that doesn't want to."  
"That's okay. I understand. You don't have to do anything if it doesn't feel right." He placed a hand on her arm "I'm glad you're here anyway." He watched her take off, looping through the air.

“Hey Peridot, find anything yet?”  
"Steven, we have been here for all of ten minutes. Proper scientific process takes time, diligence and-”  
“Soo, what have you got?”  
“Hmpf." Peridot took a look at her results. "Well I’m definitely getting some atypical readings, although that could be a result of leftover energy from the Diamonds healing. I mean it all had to go somewhere didn’t it.”  
“What about Pearl? Is she still here?”  
“The results on that are, uncertain. There’s no denying that there is some energy there, but like I said, with the healing energy from you and the Diamonds, I can’t really say if it is her or no- there’s too much interference. Without a similar example to compare my results to I can't tell you any more than that." Amethyst and Garnet shared a look. "What?"

One warp later they looked out on the rows and rows of Pearls. "Oh wow." Peridot took a few steps to the left, then to the right. "It's like their eyes follow you around the room. This is properly creepy!" Peridot stepped down into the room.  
Bismuth looked around. "Did all of these Pearls disobey their owners? There are so many."  
"Peridot, we are here for Pearl." Garnet reminded the gem and Peridot started from where she had been waving in front of one of the statues eyes.  
"Right, of course. There should be enough data here to resolve any interference. More than enough."  
Steven had left their side, walking along the statues. Every so often he caught a glimpse of a familiar looking Pearl, so alike the ones he knew. He wondered what their colours were, what they were like, what they did to end up here. He stubbed his toe on a pile of masonry and looked up to see a Pearl almost in two, an empty indent in in the remains of her naval the only sign of her gem. He crouched, sifting through the rubble, finding only dust. How long had they been here?  
“Oh, I’m going to need my equipment!” Peridot’s voice pulled him out of his reverie and she busily spouted a list of everything she would need.

They fetched the equipment returning to the garden getting straight to work, carrying it all down and setting it up. Bismuth was arguing with Peridot over where the wires should go. Lapis circled high above them and, after healing Peridot of an over-dramatised splinter, Steven chanced his luck and had another surreptitious attempt at healing Pearl. It still didn’t work and Steven retreated to try and rack his brains, trying to figure out why. A flash on the warp pad snapped him out of it, flaring away to reveal Pink Pearl. She paused, hovering around the warp pad she caught his eye, recluctant to come down into the garden proper. Steven made his way up to her, leaving the others to their discussions on whether the pillars were secure enough to use as supports.

"Er," Steven began, unsure how to explain this to her.  
"I know." She said quickly, "Spinel is pretty upset. She doesn't want to come back here."  
"Of course." Steven said and Pink Pearl's face flushed. If I had talked to you in the first place, she thought, then none of this would have happened. She gathered herself up and spoke.  
"Look, I know you did this for me, and I appreciate the sentiment but it really wasn't necessary. You caught me by surprise. I wasn't ready." She looked towards Pearl. "You didn't need to risk this for me."  
"If I had known what would happen I'd have told her not to." Steven stood by her side. "I would have tried to stop her. I should have tried to stop her." And yet... He trailed off, watching the others become frantic as one of the pillars began to wobble. Pink Pearl seemed content to watch in silence as they managed to catch it between them, only for another to immediately crash to the ground behind them, covering the lot of them in white dust. Steven caught himself looking at her scar and looked away, hoping she wouldn't notice. Her hand drifted upward. Oh. "So White Diamond did that to you?"  
"Yes."  
"You didn't deserve that. Any of it."  
Pink Pearl frowned. "I don't think there was anything that could have stopped her. White had had enough. She was determined to teach Pink a lesson one way or another." She looked up at Steven and managed a wry smile. "Although clearly it didn't work."  
"They were going to shatter you, just to control her." Steven stopped, the horrendousness of the idea pulled all across his face. "I know they've done some terrible things, but they still surprise me sometimes. They can be so... Alien."  
"Am I an alien too?" Pink's question caught Steven off guard and he floundered, his brain catching itself in cycles of yes and no. She saved him by continuing. "I don't think White thought enough of us to shatter us." She gestured towards Pearl "Look at this. White was so convinced at her image of perfection that she decided we were better used preserved as statues. I think she viewed the idea of shattering of her creations a waste of art, nothing more." She fell silent her hand drifting towards the cracks over her eye.  
"Until you stood up to her. That was so brave."  
"Bravery had no part in it. I was simply telling the truth. I didn't do anything wrong but still it manages to hurt those I care about." She turned to him "Steven, I'm so sorry this h-" Pink Pearl abruptly cut off as Steven hugged her tears beading in the corners of his eyes. "Steven?" She tried to force him away and he flinched, hurriedly pulling off with a fluster of apologies.  
"Sorry, I just" he wiped the tears off his face "I get that. I really, really do."  
"Steven,” she reached out to him “I want to help. If you need me to do anything for you just let me know." She put on a smile for him.  
"Uh, well that's nice but I don't think there's anything you could-"  
"I could be your Pearl." Stevens brain screeched to an abrupt halt.  
"What? No!" Steven stumbled away from her. "That's not- No!"  
"What's wrong? Surely if she's unable to fulfil her duties you require someone who can, and I would be more than willing to step in. White Diamond won't mind at all."  
"It doesn't work like that! You can't just replace her."  
"But," Pink Pearl blinked, uncertain.  
"No!" Steven took several steps back face full of anguish and turned away, heading back towards the statue, leaving Pink Pearl alone and confused. She watched as his mood changed, complimenting the Lapis as they all gathered around the statue, sharing congratulatory pats on the back, and embracing. Pink Pearl stepped back and let the warp take her away.

Garnet had withdrawn to a quiet corner of the garden, meditating intently whilst the rest of the crystal gems kept busy running around for Peridot. After finding he was constantly getting in their way Steven set up camp by the statue, and kept talking to Pearl, trying to explain what they were doing, working hard to keep up a one sided light-hearted chat, only leaving her side for human necessities. Amethyst and Bismuth occasionally joined him, giving him the respite he needed as he felt his voice start to tire. After a while Connie arrived, and the two of them spent some time training.

Connie saw the opportunity as Steven yawned, jumping back in and brining the sword down towards his head. At the last moment she turned it, letting the flat of the blade bounce against his hair with a hollow BONK.  
"Ow." He rubbed his head and looked at her hurt.  
“Focus Steven!”  
“Right.” He readied his shield and waited for Connie’s attack, pushing away first one, then another strike. An exclamation from Peridot tore his attention away. She’d found something! He was already turning to hurry over, only to see her shaking her head once more.  
“Steven!” Connie’s voice snapped him back to the matter at hand, and he spun round, hastily pulling up his shield between them, cursing that he’d let her get the better of him once again.  
Connie stood, sword already away, looking at him with gentle concern. “Steven, maybe this isn't the best idea right now. This isn’t a fair fight."  
"No no it's fine, I'm" he yawned again "ready for anything."  
Connie narrowed her eyes "Steven, when was the last time you slept?"  
"Last night." Steven defended.  
"Uh-huh." Connie placed her hand on her hip "and what day was that?"  
"Tuesday?"  
"Steven," Connie yelled "It's Thursday! Right, you need to go home and sleep!"  
"But-”  
“No ‘but’s.”  
“but Pearl,"  
"Pearl would be telling you the exact same thing."  
"But, but," he glanced around desperately and caught sight of Peridot, muttering over her tablet.  
"Is that it? Yes it could work, but no in that state... But what if we"  
"Peridot! Wait, Peridot!” Steven rushed over “Did you find something?"  
"Well… yes”  
“Yes!” Steven pumped the air.  
“and no, no not really.” She continued and Steven’s face fell “Well maybe, but for it to stand any chance of working I'd have to hack right into her core programming and make some tweaks."  
“Is that dangerous?”  
“Terribly!” She seemed strangely enthusiastic about it. “If it goes wrong it could completely obliterate any traces of sentience. We would lose her forever! She’d be reduced to no more than a dumb lump of stone, which thinking about it wouldn't be much different to the current state of affairs. I'll go get the pliers!"  
"We are not hacking anybody." Garnet loomed behind the small gem towering over her with her hands on her hips. Peridot gulped, giggled and retreated safely out of the statue and Garnet’s reach. Garnet turned to Steven. "Connie's right. You need sleep."

Connie helped the gems drag Steven back home. They had pizza, and then he was sent to bed, and then back to bed after he tried to sneak back out again. Garnet and Amethyst set up watch by the warp pad watching TV, the night drawing on as the interruptions eventually petered out.

After a while Amethyst flopped upside down on the couch and looked over at Garnet, the TV still flickering on unheeded in the background. "Hey Garnet?" Amethyst rolled over to focus on the bigger gem. "Garnet!" She didn't respond so with a groan Amethyst got up and went over. "Yo GARNET!" The sound echoed around the room, and she glanced at the door, wondering, a little belatedly whether Bismuth had thought to soundproof the room. "Gaarrr-neeeet!" She stage whispered, throwing an anxious look back outside. She waved in front of Garnets eyes, and tried punching her on the arm, only to meet solid skin. Suppressing a yelp and waving her hand about Amethyst changed tack. "Oh no! This is terrible! Garnet's turned into a statue too! I have to go get Steven to save us all before we're -"  
"Amethyst." Garnet cut her off, finally stirring.  
"Oh! False alarm."  
"I am trying to see." Garnet explained with forced patience "it is easier without unnecessary distractions."  
"I know, but you've been looking for ages."  
"There are many possible futures."  
"Yeah, but it doesn't usually take you this long." Amethyst sat down "are you okay?" Garnet didn't reply. "Is this about what happened this morning?" There was more silence. "Uh. Don’t make me have to go all soppy on you."  
"It's my fault."  
"Oh yay, now everyone's playing the blame game. Also that's a stupid idea."  
"I didn't see it Amethyst. I'm supposed to anticipate this!"  
"Oh give over! You can't expect to see everything every time! You were distracted! It happens, get over yourself."  
"I shouldn't have been. It was just another possible future-"  
"Hey it was terrifying. Something like that would have given me nightmares too."  
"I' was careless, throwing Pearl into another future blind just because the one I saw scared me so much!"  
"I thought you said it was-"  
"I saw war Amethyst, I saw armies of gems angry with our choices standing against us all."  
"So what? We've always had to fight for what's right. We're the Crystal Gems, it's what we do."  
"You weren’t there the first time. We do not want to descend into another."  
"So we're not." Amethyst pointed out "you said yourself this is a completely different future. You don't need to be worrying about 'what ifs?' Just think about what we could make it be." Amethyst flitted between a few animal forms to emphasise her point. "Live in the moment.” Garnet didn’t respond so Amethyst tried again. “Look, you never talk about what happened then, but I bet there were loads of times there when you were up against something bad, something seemingly impossible, and you always made it through. If you can do that there, you can do it here. So Garnet," Amethyst climbed over and laid down across her lap pointing up at her. "take off your future head and tell me what we can do to make this better.” Amethyst waited, hoping for some response, only to find herself rolling on the floor as Garnet stood and made for the door. "Garnet?" She paused.  
"I need some air."

Garnet found herself walking along the beach front, letting the gentle noise of waves brushing over the sand settle her mind. There were stars here too, a different set filling the sky, blotted out by the bright glow of the moon, nearly full.  
A shadow flitted across the beach and she looked up to see a figure flying above.  
"Lapis!" Garnet's voice carried, and she turned and came down, landing on the beach.  
"Oh hey Garnet. Nice night out."  
"You're meant to be on duty for another half hour!"  
"Oh it’s fine, it's covered. That other Pearl wanted to stay a while, to talk to her."  
"Pink Pearl?"  
"Yeah. I think she really needed it. Oh." Lapis was left as Garnet turned, departing in a leap towards the house. “Well bye then.”

Garnet appeared on the warp pad. It took her a moment to realise She could hear singing, her heart leaping as it sounded like- Pearl!  
Pink Pearl. She hadn't noticed the noise of her arrive so Garnet ducked out of sight and listened, hiding out of the way as some of the lyrics came through, filled with raw pain and anguish.

‘That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we ccould flyyyy!  
I did all I could to help her,  
how can I now live without her  
I don't know, but I try

Together everything was beautiful  
Together everything was right  
When she was sad I'd put my arms around her  
Then she was gone oh how I cried

That's how they took my life  
Torn from my Diamonds side  
Like a fool without flight  
I did all I could to help her,  
And when our positions had turned about her,  
Her response was no reply.

Oh Diamond did you leave me?  
Oh Diamond did you see me?  
Oh Diamond can you hear me?  
When you were gone oh how I cried!

‘You couldn't love her like I loved Her,  
You couldn't have yearned to make her smile  
I always made her happier  
I always made her strong  
When she was gone oh how I cried

That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we ccould flyyyy!  
I did all I could to help her,  
how can I now live without her  
I don't know, but I try

Together everything was beautiful  
Together everything was right  
When she was sad I put my arms around her  
And she was gone oh how I cried

That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we ccould flyyyy!  
I did all I could to help her,  
how can I now live without her  
I don't know, but I try.’

Garnet picked her moment, and returned to the warp pad, immediately rushing down to Stevens room, a surprised Amethyst following.  
"Steven!" Garnet called urgently.  
“Ahhh!” Steven leapt awake with a start, jumping out of bed and looking around bleary eyed, poofing up his shield “Who’s attacking?” He mumbled.  
Garnet ran up to him, grabbing him by the shoulders. "You need to go talk with Pink Pearl."  
"Pearl’s attacking?"  
“No, no-one is attacking. You need to go talk with her.”  
Steven caught sight of his alarm clock. Three thirty-two! “Garnet, it’s the middle of the night!”  
“That doesn’t matter!”  
“Go to sleep Steven, wake up Steven. I'm never going to-”  
"There's no time for that. Now's your chance." Steven froze.  
"For what?"  
"Remember why you were there. Remember why this happened"  
Steven looked down at his slippers. “Pink Pearl.”  
“Steven, everything that’s happened; Pearl would want you to make it worth something. Now go!” Steven nodded, and left.

He caught her at the warp pad, face frozen in surprise as he appeared. She glanced back at the statue, "I, ah didn't mean to" she stuttered, edging backwards.  
"It's okay, it's okay. I understand. You needed to talk to her. In fact I should have gotten you two to talk sooner."  
Pink Pearl flushed an even deeper pink, clasping her hands and studying the ground.  
Steven persevered. "It's not your fault. None of this is.”  
She turned away "there's just so much...” Her voice broke into a half a sob, and she stiffened, trying to compose herself before continuing. “Steven, about before, I'm sorry."  
"Don't be. Actually," Steven perked up "what you said, about being my Pearl. It got me thinking. You've never seen Earth have you?"  
"No,” her hand touched the cracks on her eye “it was before Pink got her colony."  
"I know you must miss her, missing out on all those years. I can't bring those back for you, but I can show you. Everything she did, everything she fought for is there."  
"What?"  
"Let me show you Earth!" He held out his hand. "The Grand tour! Come on, there's still time to catch the sunrise."

The lighthouse glinted in the morning glow as they looked out over Beach City.  
"It's beautiful." Pink Pearl crouched down and gently caressed a yellow flower in the grass. "I’m not surprised she liked it here. It's all so... Rustic. I can see why they made it a colony."  
Steven laughed "Rustic? You should see the barn!" He blinked "You should see the barn, and Little Home-world, and Beach City- properly. I will give you the Ultimate tour, I won't stop until you've seen all the places that make Earth so great!" Steven struck a pose, pointing outwards into the great wide world. There was a loud grumble and Pink glanced at Steven's gem in trepidation. It rumbled again. "Buuut I need some breakfast first." He laughed "That's what being part human means- I kinda need food to keep running."  
"But we're not running."  
"Not yet. Race you to the big donut!" Steven zoomed by her, encasing himself in a bubble and rolling down the hill, leaving a trail of battered buttercups in his wake. She made her way down to the store, rejoining Steven at the counter.  
"Hey Pink, would you like a Donut?"  
"Me?” Steven nodded. Pink Pearl leant over and studied the display “Spinel was telling me about these. She certainly seemed to enjoy them. Yes. I will try one."  
"Two of your best donuts!"

They headed outside with their bounty to eat. "Here you are! A pink donut for a Pink Pearl!"  
She took it quietly staring at the colourful sprinkles "It's just Pearl you know." Steven had confusion etched over his face so she clarified "My name."  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I guess I was just trying to not get you mixed up with the others. I mean there's Blue Pearl, Yellow Pearl."  
"Blue's Pearl. Yellow's Pearl." She corrected. “All of us are Pearl.” She sat on the edge of the wall, and Steven joined her.  
"Doesn’t that get confusing?"  
"Not really. What's so confusing about a name?"  
"It's just when I'm talking about Pearl,"  
"You're always talking about her. I guess I should get used to that." She took an experimental bite out the donut. "Hmm. Not bad." She studied the confectionery. There was even Pink inside!  
"And if I'm talking about Pink, it's probably about Pink Diamond." Steven tapped his foot. "Maybe I should introduce names. For a society of groups of nearly identical beings, it might bring a bit of individuality back. What do you think?" Pearl looked at him, mouth full of donut. She swallowed hurriedly.  
"Me?"  
"Yeah. Would you pick a name for yourself?"  
"I don't know."  
"Well what do you like?" He just got a blank stare from her. "Well what about designations? Even Peridot had FX something or other. You could use that as your starting point."  
"I- I don't have one." She frowned, "I don't think any Pearl does. No gem has ever had more than one Pearl and whenever there's been more than one of us around we'd just be picked out as our owner's Pearl. It's a system that's worked for thousands of years. We never needed anything more."  
"We definitely need to get you names.” He glanced at her. She was just staring at the donut as it dripped filling into the sand. Ah! He kicked himself. All this talk about names, he was losing her. “We’ll leave that for another time.” Steven jumped up, brushing off the crumbs. "So, are you ready for the grand tour?" He held out his hand. "There's some people I'd like you to meet."  
He took her to meet Vivaldi, dropped in on Sadie and even introduced her to Peedee and Onion.

"This is little home world! A load of gems who we rescued and healed from corruption are making their new lives here."  
Pearl edged closer to Steven as she spotted a couple gems step away from her, fear in their eyes. Another gem, white and grey with a sunshine white mane was staring at her. She narrowed her eyes, but the gem broke into a smile, and waved. What was going on? Steven was still chattering on, not having noticed and drew her onto the warp pad. She realised that there were gems waving at him too, smiling for him. She drew closer to him, catching something about ‘corals’ before they disappeared in a flash.

They spent the morning sightseeing, touring around numerous gem structures falling into various states of decay, each being swallowed by the bright and teeming life that flourished on Earth, and mirrored by the growing spread of human towns and cities. It was beautiful, in its own way. Steven noticed each time she looked around with interest, curiosity drawing her to a new flower, or view, but he was yet to see her smile. Time to try another tack.

"This is my dad's car wash. He works here. He doesn't have to now he finally made it in the music business but still keeps it going. Be careful. Sometimes, on a quiet day like this he's likes to- garglefargleblaaah!" A jet of water sprung up, catching Steven straight in the face.  
"Aha, got you!" Greg jumped out from around the corner, hosepipe in hand. Steven was already laughing, dodging further strikes as they ran across the forecourt back and forth, Steven launching abandoned sponges back in a token counter-attack, before being pinned behind a deckchair. Greg advanced on him. "Hands in the air you little rascal, or I’ll soak!”  
"Oh no! I meet my end!" Steven spread his arms, preparing to get drenched.  
Greg turned the nozzle, and a small dribble of water came out the last few drops pattering to a stop on the ground. "Huh?" They looked up the hose to see Pearl stood holding the other end, detached from the tap.  
"It's okay, it's okay- it's just a bit of fun." Steven hurriedly explained, climbing to his feet.  
"Man, what is it with Pearls being party-poopers?" Greg waved the hose about "Don't they have fun on home wor-argh!" It came to life again, launching a stream of water straight into his face, and after a moments surprise Steven dissolved into fits of laughter. Greg coughed and spluttered, catching a glimpse of a huge grin on the Pearls face before she replaced it with a look of innocence. He began to laugh too. "Well, I guess that showed me."  
"That was brilliant!" Steven gushed over Pearl.  
"Oh, it was all just timing."  
"You really didn't get to have much fun on home world did you?"  
"Pink Diamond would. She always found a way to make others smile, and me. Although the other Diamonds didn't approve of that." She mimicked Yellow Diamonds voice "'She shouldn't be playing with a Pearl!' We always had to be careful around them." She sighed. “I still enjoyed it though. She always had a lovely smile.” Steven had a huge grin on his face and was hopping from foot to foot.  
"I know what we can do!" Steven grabbed her hand again. "To Funland!"

After some persuasion work on Mr Smiley, Steven and Pearl were let loose on the funfair, taking turns on the roller-coaster, the games at the arcade, and both failing miserably at the 'shoot the spaceship' game which once upon a time Steven himself had objected to. After trying every ride what seemed like a hundred times they found themselves wandering through the house of mirrors.  
"Hey!” Steven pointed at Pearls reflection “You look like Garnet in that one!"  
"Really?” Pearl peered at the lumpy form before turning and doing her best Garnet impression, 'You should have your eyes checked.'"  
"Woah, it's like she's really here! Do it again, do it again!" Steven hopped around, looking up at her expectantly. She crossed her arms.  
"'No.'" The simple word sent Steven into a frenzy of delight.  
"How are you doing that? You're really good!"  
"Oh it's just a knack."  
"Do another one- Oo, oo, I know: do Amethyst!"  
Pearl looked around, and stepped in front of a mirror that made her shorter.  
"'Eeh, there are better places to be.'"  
Stevens eyes had gone as wide as saucers. "Now do me!"  
"'Can you teach me how to juggle?" She giggled still in the bright female voice and fell silent, mirroring Stevens quiet demeanour  
"That was Pink Diamond wasn't it." He said. Pearl nodded.“Do you miss her a lot?” Another nod.  
She shifted and her voice cracked as she spoke. “She was my life.”  
"Come on, let me show you something.

He took her back to the house  
Inside Steven pulled her partway up the stairs and waved at the portrait that hung there. "This is my Mum, Rose Quartz."  
Pearl studied the picture her mouth agape. She took an abrupt step back and Steven had to grab her, stopping her from tumbling down the stairs. She barely noticed, a look of terror on her face as she looked up at Rose Quartz.  
"What's wrong?"  
"That's not her,” her voice rose in a panic as she grasped at Steven. “That's not Pink Diamond."  
"Well no. She became Rose Quartz, she shifted her gem and lived as the rebellion leader."  
"No, that's not what I meant." Pearl pointed at the portrait "that's not Pink Diamond, or Rose Quartz, whatever she called herself. I'd know if it was her. I know her!"  
"Pearl…" Steven held on, trying to anchor her, trying to reassure her.  
"I'd know if it were her, wouldn't I?" She clung to him "that's not, that wouldn't be." She became heavy in his arms and together they sunk to the floor, and Steven wrapped her in a hug as she shook.  
She finally pulled away, curling up against the wall. "I spent my whole life by her side. Everything she did, everything she knew... I was her friend, her companion, her confidante. I was her Pearl. No one seemed to know her better than me. But now..." She turned to the portrait "that's gone, and I know less about her than any old gem."  
Steven came and sat on the step beneath her. "That's okay. I hardly knew anything about her either."  
"But” She frowned “you're her."  
"Son." Steven added. "I have her gem, but I don't really remember anything of who she was. I have one or two memories of being Pink Diamond, but that's it. Everything else I know is from others. Stories I've heard, bits I've pieced together for myself.” He disappeared up to his room, returning with a rectangular box “and this.”

The TV flickered Into life and once again his mum spoke to him, explaining who he was, and why she would never know him. They watched in silence until the end, then re-wound, pausing partway through. Pearl studied her face.  
"She looks so happy."  
"I think she was."  
Pink Pearl sighed, gazing at the paused screen, a small smile tugging at her lips. “She’s so different.” She looked at Steven “She’s so Short!”  
“Not for a human, or a quartz.”  
“True, I guess I didn’t think of it like that. How strange. And you, a gem-human hybrid. So many new faces.” She shook her head then threw it back with a laugh.  
“What is it?” Steven asked as Pearl descended into laughter.  
“Look at us,” Pearl waved at the two of them, forcing the words out between bouts of laughing “we've been doing this the wrong way round! Acting as if we were forgotten friends when we're actually complete strangers.” She bent over, prodding Steven to try and get her next thought in line “You, you wouldn't walk up to a random gem and ask them to just talk about their deepest darkest fears,"  
"Or offer to be a replacement friend for a complete alien." Steven added, and Pearl seemed to sober up. He laughed to put her at ease.  
"It's just the thought that-"  
"We could have had something like a memory of a friendship from another life." Steven finished.  
"They were good memories though, weren’t they?" She asked.  
"Yeah."  
“Mine too. The best.” Pearl sighed. "If we only knew each other again." She smiled at him, then climbed to her feet and reached out a hand. "Hello, I'm Pearl. It's my pleasure to finally meet you." Steven considered her a moment, then joined her.  
"and I'm Steven Quartz Universe." He took her hand and shook it "it's a pleasure to meet you too." The lights around them seemed to dim and their gems began to glow, mirroring each other.  
"Woah,"  
"Woah."  
Steven pulled away and the glow dimmed.  
“Wait,” Pearl stopped him "Tell me more. About her, about the gems, about all of this I'd... I'd like to know."  
"Of course."

The smell woke him up, a tantalising melody of spices and warmth. He heard the clank of a spoon against a pan and stirred, blinking as he found himself on the sofa of the beach house. He hadn’t realised he’d fallen asleep. He looked around, the table tidied, the newspapers stacked in a neat pile on the corner, gone from where they’d ended up strewn across the floor. The floor itself gleamed, devoid of the rough coating of sand it had acquired. In the kitchen Pink Pearl had her back to him, focusing instead on the food.  
“Pearl?”  
“Oh, I’m glad you’re awake. I know you need food, so I looked up a recipe, but I’m not really sure what it’s meant to taste like.” Steven wandered over, a little apprehensive. None of the gems really cooked, though Garnet could make decent cookies, but that one time Amethyst tried to make dinner it wasn’t exactly edible. But after careful investigation it looked like there weren’t any surprises in the pan, and he took a sniff.  
“Well, if it tastes as good as it smells I’m sure it’ll be fine.” She watched him expectantly. He took a spoon, dipped it in and tried it. “Hmm, that’s really good!”  
“Oh!” Pearl clapped her hands together, smiling “I’m glad! Now I haven’t found a vessel large enough to contain this portion...”  
“Portion?” Steven laughed cutting her off. “Pearl, I’m not going to able to eat all of this in one go. Maybe three or four. Less if my Dad or Amethyst finds it.” He pulled out a bowl and held it out. “This is about the right size for a meal though.”  
“Oh, of course.”  
“Thank you by the way, you didn’t need to do all this.”  
“Oh it was nothing, and like I said, I wanted to help.”  
“Well it’s good to get some grub in before I head back out, otherwise I’m gonna miss my shift.” Steven frowned, patting his pockets then looking around for his phone. The screen glinted, perched on the coffee table. “Ah, there it is. Must have left it there before I-”  
The bowl crashed to the floor, his hands trembling as he clutched the phone, soup spilling out over the woodwork. “No, no no, how could this happen?!”  
“Oh!” Pearl held her hands up “Whoopsie-daisy! It’s okay, I’ll get that all cleaned up in a tick.” she bustled over, pulling out a mop.  
“No!” Steven cried out, the anger in his voice made her pause.  
“Steven, what’s wrong?”  
“I’m late! I was meant to be in the garden an hour ago! I was meant to be there for her.” He ran over to the window, and there the sun was just reaching the horizon. They’d been away the whole day!  
“Steven, I’m sure it’s fine. The others would have come and got you if it were important.”  
“No, I needed to be there for her.” Tears were beading in his eyes “I promised I’d be there.”  
“Steven,”  
“I don’t understand, I- I had an alarm. I should have woken up! I should have known” He rested his hand on his pocket, staring at the table. “But how...” He looked up at Pearl, his mind in overdrive, looking between her and the impeccably tidy coffee table. “Pearl, did- did you turn it off?”  
“It was going to wake you up!” Pearl looked horrified “I’m sorry, I didn’t know what it meant.”  
Steven looked down at his phone, big white letters on the notification reading ‘Pearl garden shift starts, 10 min.’. Steven set his jaw. “Then why didn’t you tell me?” The pink gem didn’t answer. Steven looked around. He caught sight of a pile of clean laundry, neatly folded and stacked to one side. This, the cooking, the cleaning… His stomach lurched and he looked at her again. She tried to put on a friendly smile but he could sense the tenseness behind it. “What are you doing?”  
“Helping you of course!”  
“No. What are you doing here. This, all the cleaning, Acting like a Pearl. Why?”  
She giggled “I am a Pearl silly.”  
“THIS ISN’T A JOKE!” Steven snapped “Why are you here? What do you want?”  
“I just wanted to help you. Look at this. Look at everything I’ve been able to do for you. You needed a Pearl, I could see you needed a Pearl, I thought I could help. I thought this could work, if we just get to know each other, if I could just show you...”  
“NO! I already told you no. It was, is never going to happen.” Pearl flinched at his words and Steven frowned “Is that all today was, you trying to weasel your way into my life?”  
“Steven,”  
“Can’t you just get it into your head that you’re not her! I’m not her! I don’t need another Pearl in my life. I don’t WANT another Pearl.”  
“Then why? Why did you come to see me? Why did you interfere? I was happy enough before you showed up again.”  
“I wanted to help.”  
“So do I!” Pearl countered “Can’t we just help each other?”  
“Help who? You? Me? or is it Pink Diamond?”  
“Y-you of course… You seemed so happy earlier. I thought...”  
“I was happy because you were! Because we were trying to help you when this all kicked off! Because you starting to cheer up seemed to be the one good thing that's happened today. The one good thing to have come of this and now... All you were doing is trying to replace her. This isn’t right.”  
“I thought you wanted to help me, so let me help you!”  
“Pearl, no.”  
“You wanted to know what you could do to help: Please, let me help you! Let me do this for you!”  
“No. Let me get this absolutely clear:” He stepped forward, each word underlined by a step, forcing the pink gem to shrink backwards “You. Can’t. Be. My. Pearl.” Pearl stumbled back, and fell to the floor.  
“Then what else am I?”  
Steven stepped away. “I can’t answer that. But I’m not your Diamond. I’m not Pink Diamond and we can’t ever go back to how it was in the past. You need to understand that, you need to stop trying to be” he waved at her, and the house “this.”  
“I don’t get it. There's a hole in our lives and each of us should fill the others but it just... made it worse.” Steven seemed to consider her for a moment as she sat on the floor, arms wrapped around herself. “I just wanted my old life back.” She drew her knees to her chin, burying her face as she waited for his judgement. Steven drew himself up to his full height, face set in steely determination and looked straight at Pearl.  
“Ice cream.”  
She looked up in astonishment.  
“We should have ice cream.” Steven affirmed, and walked past her, looking through the cupboards and grabbing out packets “with sprinkles and chocolate and marshmallows.”  
“Um… okay.” Pearl got up. “What’s ice cream?” Steven dug a bit out of the tub with a spoon and passed it over for her to try. Her eyes sparkled as the sweetness hit the back of her mouth. “Wow.”  
“So what do you think?”  
“I like it.”  
Steven showed her how to scoop it out the tub, balancing it high on waffle cones and dousing it in chocolate and syrup.  
“Oh! Hang on,” he dove across the kitchen and drew out a bowl of red fruits.  
“Mini strawberries!” Pearl pointed out “Like the battlefield.”  
“We just call them strawberries.” He carefully balanced on on top of his cone, whilst Pink had covered hers in sprinkles. “There we go. Your very first ice-cream. Go on, give it a try.”  
She tilted her head, trying to work out how to start on this confection even as it began to drip. She tried to mop it up with a napkin but Steven laughed. “Try licking it.” She tried it, and beamed a huge smile at Steven who leant on the side beside her, his cone untouched. Pearl let out a little exclamation as she found some of the popping candy. “This is amazing!” Steven sighed, leant over and pushed the ice cream off her cone, letting it land on the floor with a splat.

They stared at it.  
“My ice cream!” Pearl looked at him aghast “What did you do that for?”  
“Look at it. If I picked that up now and put it back on your cone you’d still have the same ice cream, but it wouldn’t be, it’d be different. Because it’s fallen on the floor, it’s changed. We can’t un-make it fall on the floor. That’s something we can’t change. All we could do is try to re-make it, but that’s no guarantee it’d be quite the same. We could replace it,” He waved at his cone “but that wouldn’t be quite the same either. Whatever we do the original ice cream is already gone.” He waved at the cone which she was still holding. “Even if you were to use the old cone, with hints of the old ice cream, as the new cone, it’s still a different ice cream. It won’t be the same. It’s changed. Sometimes you just have to come to terms with that change, and try to make the best of it.” He watched as the ice cream began to melt in to the floor. “It doesn’t mean you don’t miss the original though, and sometimes that’s the hardest part. You’ve got to let go of the past before you can move on.” They sat in silence for a while, Pearl not once looking away from the melting spectacle before her. “Sorry about that. Here, you can have mine instead if you want.” Steven offered.  
“Is this what you think of me?”  
“What?”  
“You think I’m broken?”  
Steven sat stunned for a moment, steeling himself to look her in the eye as he answered.  
“Yes.” She stood abruptly retreating away from him as he tried to explain “But grief can do that to anyone. You need to let go of the past, stop obsessing over this” he waved at his gem “stop trying to refill the gap with something that’s gone, and start building something new. Something bigger, and just as good.” He smiled “With all the sprinkles in the world.”  
“Steven, I wouldn’t even know where to start. But you understand, you can help me.”  
“No, you have to go figure this out for yourself. Being around me, isn’t helping. It’s not going to make it any better. You need to leave. Find somewhere for yourself.”  
“You don’t want me. You’re sending me away.”  
"I’m trying to help you. Things change. Sometimes the only thing you can do is adapt to it, or you'll just burn yourself out fighting an impossible fight. Ask Spinel. She knows that better than anyone. You’re both smart and capable, and I’m sure you can work this out together, but you don’t need me.” He moved towards her, corralling her back towards the warp pad.  
“Please don’t make me go.”  
“You need to.”  
“Steven, please, My Diamond!”  
"Pink Diamond is gone. You need to learn to accept that. Now go."  
“Wait Steven,”  
“Go!”  
Pink Pearl took a breath, wanting to tell him, beg him not to cut her out of his life but instead she turned and stepped into the warp, beaming away with a chime.

Steven didn't know how long he'd been standing there when the warp pad chimed again, signalling the return of Garnet and Amethyst.  
“There you are Stu-man, how’s it going?” Amethyst called, looking around. “Hey, floor food, my favourite!” She scampered past him, inspecting the splodge of formerly ice cream, before getting distracted by the faint smells from the kitchen “Oooh watcha cooking?” She hopped over the counter and peeked in the pan.  
“Pearl cooked.”  
“Oh, floor food. I get it. No, sweat, just means there’s more for meeee!”  
“Amethyst.” Garnet stopped her, calling her back. “Steven, what’s wrong?”  
He explained. "I don't get it. We were just trying to help."  
Garnet sighed “I know you want to make everything better, but sometimes you can’t help everyone.”  
“Hey, it’s okay.” Amethyst rejoined her. “You wanna go see Pearl?”  
"I don’t know.” He stepped back, brushing through them as he put some distance between himself and the warp pad. “How can I tell her? How can I tell her that it wasn't worth it?” Garnet wrapped him in a hug and held him close until he pulled away. “Garnet did you see us save her yet?"  
"No." His face fell.  
"Well there are a lot of futures,” Steven pointed out “You, you just gotta find the right one." Garnet shook her head, ever so slightly.  
"Steven, Amethyst," she guided the two of them to sit down, and joined them "you need to prepare yourselves."  
"For what?" Steven looked between the two gems in confusion.  
"Pearl, may not be coming back." Garnet continued as Amethyst and Steven digested that revelation in silence. "I have looked into hundreds of thousands of possible futures, even some of the more improbable lines and I haven't seen a single one where we manage to get our Pearl back."  
"No, that can’t be right." Steven said, “There’s got to be something!”.  
"Wait, Garnet,” Amethyst glanced to Steven. “What about our be- talk the other morning? What about that future?"  
"We can't have that!" Garnet snapped at Amethyst "besides, I don't think we can get there any-more. Steven, I am so sorry." He didn’t answer, staring into the distance, his mind a million miles away as glistening tears ran down his cheeks.  
Amethyst let out a nervous laugh "This is one of your psych-outs right?” She asked Garnet “You tell Steven he can't do something and he turns around and finds a way to do it anyway."  
"No." Garnet popped off her visor so she could look Amethyst eye to eye. Amethyst was taken aback, her eyes all had dark rings around them, and her third eye was tinged red from trying to see for so long and so far.  
"You’re serious." Amethyst realised in dismay "but that means... no more Opal,"  
"No more Sardonyx."  
"No more Pearl.”  
"No." Steven spoke, filled with quiet determination. "I don't care what you've seen, or not seen. We're Crystal Gems! Impossible situations are just another days work. We can do this! We're not giving up on her. We just have to keep trying."  
“Steven,” Garnet started, but Steven held up his hands to stop her, knowing he had to say it.  
“I’m not ready to give up on her.” He drew his hands together, cradling them in his chest as he waited for their response. Garnet and Amethyst shared a look, a silent understanding passing between them.  
"Tell us what you want to do" said Garnet. His heart leapt.  
"Those other Pearl statues,” he said “there's gotta be something we've missed."

Amethyst let out a frustrated groan. "We've been here for aaaages. We've searched every single inch of this place, there is nothing left to find."  
"Amethyst!” Garnet whispered “We need to keep looking, and quietly." She pointed over to where Steven was propped up against a pillar, his head drifting down towards his chest, catching himself awake with a start, before drifting off again.  
He could hear whispering.  
"Hello? Who's there?" The background noise quietened, then grew, faded voices repeating his question. He glanced down, knowing his body would be there and looked around. The statues were gone, instead hundreds of lights filled the space before him. He floated above them and could see Garnet and Amethyst as they inspected a wall to one side, pondering about a secret passageway. But theirs weren't the voices he was hearing. Those drew him towards the centre of the room. "Hello? Is anyone there? Can you help me?"  
"Help. Me. Heeeelp. HELP ME." The whispered echoes built into a wave, calling out to him. They sounded familiar.  
"Who’s there? Pearl is that you?”  
“Pearl Meeee...”  
“Pearl?”  
He leant forward and something reached out of the darkness, a hand, coming quickly towards him. He jerked away, but another grabbed his foot. “Help ussss!”  
Steven yelled out and tried to kick himself away, but another hand came out of the darkness, and another and another. He wriggled, dislodging one or two, but they kept piling on, pulling him back away from the safety of his body. “No! Let me go!” A figure appeared in front of him, arms reaching up, her skin green hued, eyes bright reflective saucers, a pale oval gem nestled in the palm of her hand. “You’re a Pearl! You’re here, you’re all still here!” The realisation hit him as they redoubled their hold on him. Pearl! “No, wait, you have to let me go, my friend! Aaah!” He pushed against them. “I have to help her! Please!” They paid no heed to his cries, slowly, inexorably dragging him back down into the shadows. “Help me! Garnet, Amethyst, HELP!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2/5
> 
> Chapters due pre-Christmas 2019 (Trying for Pre-7th December due to Steven Universe Future airing)
> 
> Thank you for reading, I am always open to ongoing improvement of my work so any feedback is gratefully received.


	3. Lost Pearl

The pain had been stabbing through her body had gone, and a bright whiteness filled her head. It felt like she was falling though there was no rushing air, no streaking lights to flicker past her. This wasn't the safety of her gem, the warm quiet time spent redefining herself. This was a light that was there to scrape you away, light you up and burn you out, so bright it hurt yet so intense it sunk into you so you couldn't look away. Something trembled on the edge of her hearing. ‘Spinel go get the others.’ The light faded, and she found herself back in the garden.

Steven was there looking at her with concern. "Pearl, Pearl are you in there?"

“Yes.” She ventured, before gathering confidence “Yes, I’m here, Steven it's okay, I'm back. I'm okay!" She laughed nervously "Whatever that was it took me for quite a turn!"

"Pearl if you can hear me say something!"

"Steven, I'm here. There's no need to shout."

"Anything, just speak to me, just let me know you're okay."

"I am Steven, I'm right here!" But you can't hear me. She reached out to him, but her stomach lurched as she felt only air.

“Please Pearl, just give me a sign you’re there.” Tears filled his eyes, even as she tried to comfort him. "Pearl!" his voice broke and she tried to turn to follow him as he dove out of sight, but her view stayed resolutely the same. She could just about see the fluff of the top of his head. She tried looking around, up down, left right, but she couldn't see anything new, though she had the sensation that she had moved. She raised her hand in front of her face. Nothing. She tried waving but that made no difference. She had a thought, and clapped her hands together, heart leaping as they connected, but the noise of it was quiet and strangely muffled, so much so that she doubted if it was there after all. Panic rising she patted down her limbs just to reassure herself they were here, then tentatively touched her face. Even with a hand over her eyes all she saw was that garden.

She flinched.

Steven had reappeared in her view hoiking a large spitball into his hands, rubbing them together and planting them on what she guessed were her shoulders, though there was no sensation of it. It was all like she was caught in some strange video. Or a nightmare. "What is going on here?"

He couldn't hear her, she knew, but it helped her focus.

"What's wrong with me?"

A sneaking suspicion gnawed at her. But Steven was going to heal it, he was healing her, right?  
She reassured herself as he stepped back, frustration etched into his face. Hygiene aside Pearl watched the next attempt, willing it to work, willing herself to get back to her body and unfreeze. Steven stepped back again, looking at his palms despondently.

"Why aren't my powers working?" Steven moaned, and Pearl saw him summon his shield, poofing a bubble and hopping into the air, and slowly floating down again. He had a frown on his face. "Oh! I know," he licked his hand again and this time it came up towards her face. She tried to pull away, but couldn’t.

"Err, Steven?" It loomed up, then passed to land on her forehead. Her gem. Her hands flew to her head and she felt the cool dome of her gem where it should be. But it was cold and lifeless, staying dormant at her touch. Her view brightened as Steven stepped back once more, caught in an expression of deep thought.

"Perhaps we can fuse you out!" That wasn't such a bad idea, and Pearl quickly started to dance as Steven did around her, remembering familiar moves, and letting them flow. But she couldn't close her eyes and her mind, skipping between the flow of the dance and the unmoving view, faltered, sending her stumbling. She tried again even as Steven did but it got worse, devoid of any sense of floor her points went wide, her arms and legs clattering into each other. She stopped. This... Wasn't working.

She heard the warp pad before Steven noticed.  
"Oh no. Steven!"  
"Garnet!" Pearl called.  
"Not another one of those creepy Pearl statues."  
"Amethyst! You're here!" Pearl was glad to see her fellow gems.  
"It's okay Steven we're here."  
"Garnet! Amethyst, can you hear me? Please, just one of you! Garnet! Can you see me? I’m here! Steven, Garnet, Amethyst, please can somebody just hear me!” Pearl shouted then cursed at the stars.  
"Where's Pearl?" Amethyst asked.  
"I'm here, I'm right here." Pearl cried  
"What?" Amethyst was getting closer, then finally appeared into view."Whaaat?! But- what? Did some creepy gem monster get her?!”  
"You're really here." Amethyst looked up at her, appalled and disbelieving.  
"Steven, tell us what happened."  
"She was telling us what happened to Pink Pearl, then she started changing, losing all her colour. My powers couldn't stop it, then she couldn't discorporate, then she was a statue. It happened so fast-"

Wait- statue? She was dimly aware that Steven was still talking. In front of her Amethyst let out a quiet huff, that hunched tenseness that usually meant she was about to argue with Pearl, or storm off. But she turned a dime and gave Steven her best bubbly Amethyst.  
"Whaaat? But your healing powers work great. Maybe they just need a little longer to work. I reckon if you close your eyes take your time and really focus, that could bring her back."  
"I dunno..." Steven fidgeted, looking at his hands. She could see what he was thinking. He’d already tried, and it hadn’t worked.  
"It's worth a try. I believe in you." Garnet had joined her, with her own encouraging nod.  
"You're right." Steven licked his hand and planted it on Pearl once more. She was really going to need another shower. Behind Amethyst had shifted into Purple Puma, cheering him on.  
"You can do it Steven!" Then she punched Garnet out of sight into the bushes and jumped after her.  
"No! Please don't fight!" Pearl watched anxiously until they sprung back, Steven still blissfully unaware of the skirmish, but Pearl wanted more than anything to reach out to him, reassure him everything was going to be okay.  
But Garnet stepped up. "Steven" she said, "sometimes our power alone is not enough. That's okay. You once healed corrupted gems we had long thought impossible to redeem, by ending a war and convincing the Diamonds to work together. We will find a way through this." Amethyst joined them, placing a hand on his other shoulder.  
"Together." They embraced, holding each other tight and Pearl watched, knowing if should could cry she would be. Pearl gasped as Garnet turned to her, cupping her face and looking straight at her.  
"Pearl, if you're in there we're-" Pearl cried out, desperately scrabbling at her face to block out the vision of herself, frozen in a cold white stone. Her mind shifted. Memories flickering through unbidden.

It was nearly 8 thousand years ago. She looked up to White Diamond, for the first time, instructing her how she should best look after Pink Diamond. “Why the sentence for Treason is shattering!” "You must never tell anyone of this." Then Pinks words came through, Her hands over her mouth, the figure changing. "They won't know." “Don’t go, you can’t tell her!” "What they don't know won't hurt them." "You can't tell them." "Pearl, my last orders to you as your Diamond, you must never speak of this to anyone." She could feel the words tightening around her.  
Pink Pearl appeared. "There are much worse things a gem can suffer." She began to change, her colour fading. "No, White! Don't-" Pearl called out, as her counterpart once again had the colour drained from her. But it was more than that. Pink Pearl floated before her, covering her mouth as her skin changed to cold white stone.  
"A Pearl is meant to serve." She opened her eyes, glaring straight at Pearl, and cracked.  
"Ahhhh!" Pearl cried, the vision disappearing. Garnet and the others were there in front of her, planning their next move. Steven glanced back at her, a dampness around his eyes. "Steven, I am so sorry." She knew, she knew there would be consequences for breaking an order and she did it anyway.  
She had thought herself above the old rules, after so long, after so much change and yet here she was. She was still a Pearl. The arrival of Blue and Yellow Diamond only confirmed it. She had triggered an old punishment for disobedient Pearls. Yes they’d even made, her, every element of who she was had the paw-prints of the Diamonds over it. It was bad enough she’d had so many dopplegangers, crude imitations of That design on the whim of the Pearl’s owners to curry some favour with the Diamonds. She was almost glad they couldn’t see the look of disgust on her face.  
Then White appeared, cooing over Steven.

"White. White!” She called out to her “You know what this is about, this is yours, you made this, you can undo this!” She watched expectantly as the Diamond turned to look at Steven.  
“Well, I'm sure we can find you a new one."  
“What?! No!" Stevens response was instant "I don’t want a new one, I want this one back!”  
Pearl’s head lurched again, memories flashing to the fore. Except this time she was Pearl he was pointing at. She was the Pearl out of reach. She was the Pearl that was... broken.  
“White! Listen to me, if you can hear me you have to undo this!”  
“Help her? Steven I never really designed this to be… helped.” White Diamond stood, disappearing out of sight.  
“I don’t believe that.” I can’t believe that, thought Pearl.  
“What is done is done.” She seemed so certain, so indifferent to it all.  
“But you could fix this, you could fix all of this!” Pearl shouted. Defective Pearl indeed. What was that Blue and Yellow were saying? ‘Hand picked specially by White Diamond.’ Angry muttering around her confirmed she wasn’t the only only White was getting on the wrong side of. She could just imagine Garnet holding Amethyst back, all the while keeping her own quiet fury hidden behind that visor of hers.  
“I want her back." Steven. For a moment she’d forgotten he was there. He walked over to her, looking straight at her and she could see the tear streaks on his cheeks. "This isn’t fair, we were just trying to help! She disobeyed a stupid order because she's kind and brave and caring. This isn't her fault,"  
“Oh Steven,” He was always so caring.  
"We have to fix this so please, help me put it right.”  
Well, if they couldn’t hear her, at least they would listen to him.  
“Steven,” White Diamond responded “I don’t even know if it is possible. I’m not even sure if there’s anything left to bring back.”  
“Oh, there is White. STEVEN, I’m here, I’m ready. Come on Steven, you just have to convince them to try.”  
“Please, she’s family. We have to try.” Steven was almost taking the words out of her mouth.  
"It's never been done before." White was hesitating. Of course she was. Even now she tried to avoid responsibility for her actions. Even now she found it hard to admit where she was wrong, always seeming to deflect and reshape the problem as an effect of Steven’s schemes.  
Garnet was speaking "there is a first for everything." Steven looked up at the Diamonds.  
She heard movement, big heavy footsteps as the Diamonds gathered around Pearl. She caught a glimpse of Yellow, Blue and White in Stevens eyes. Oh boy she thought, here we go. One by one the Diamonds focused, their glow growing around themselves and reaching out through their arms. Pearls vision filled with colour, growing in brightness as it spun around her and she felt its warmth. She waited for something to happen then the light dimmed, fading away as Steven exhaled.

He took a step back.

Pearl knew, even as Blue spoke. "It didn't work." It didn’t work?  
"Well we can still get you a new one."  
"NO!"  
“Steven wait, it’s okay-!” Pearl yearned to go after him, reassure him that everything was fine, but she could only watch the watchers, and hear the distance chime of the warp pad as it finally swallowed his sobs.  
"Should we-?" Blue Diamond asked.  
"No. You have done all you can."  
“My Diamonds. My Diamond. I came as soon as I heard.”  
Pearl’s stomach lurched as she recognised the voice. Pink Pearl. Pearl held her breath, listening for her footsteps as she approached. Not that she needed to. She could almost tell where she was by the way the Diamonds purposely turned their gaze away, no-one wanting to be the one to try and explain this. “What’s this? What happened here?” Nobody answered her. “Please, I just came to find out why Spinel is crying in our room, refusing to come to this place. Why did she come back here in the first place, she hates it-” Pink Pearl cut off abruptly. Pearl knew what that meant, and sure enough Pink Pearl came around into view, looking at her in confusion.  
“After they saw you earlier Pearl told Steven about how you met. She thought it might help you.” Garnet said, straight to the point as always. She looked at Pearl. “But it did this instead.”  
“Help?” White Diamond asked, leaning over. Pink Pearl flushed, her face tinting an even deeper pink, her fists clenching tighter. “Whatever do you mean?”  
“Spinel came and asked Steven to help Pink Pearl because she thought she wasn’t happy.”  
“Oh, Oh my!” White Diamond seemed taken back, but Garnet pressed on.  
“Now Spinel is unhappy, Steven’s unhappy, Me and Amethyst and the three of you are unhappy and Pink Pearl is still unhappy.”  
“I’m fine!” Pink Pearl burst out, glowering at the lot of them. She blinked and hurriedly bowed with a salute, gritting her teeth “My Diamonds.”  
“Oh! Oh, well,” White looked at her with concern “Perhaps you should” she glanced towards Garnet “take some time to play with Spinel! Playing’s very good at cheering people up.”  
“But I have duties-”  
“Oh no, no don’t worry about them.” White Diamond tried to reassure her “In fact Steven said we shouldn’t have Pearls around anyway. It’ll be best if you don’t serve me.”  
“But My Diamond!”  
“I’m sure you’ll feel much better.”

“Wow,” Pearl finally said, as the Diamonds left one by one. “I never thought I would hear White Diamond say a thing like that.” Pink Pearl was staring at her statue in disbelief, hands still half up in a Diamond salute. “It is for the best, Pearl. You can start anew, find out what you want to be. No more owners. No more running around after the Diamonds.”  
Pink stumbled back then clutched at her head, muttering. “What? No! what do I do? What do I do?!”  
“Go home.” Garnet appeared by her side, making the poor gem jump. “don’t worry about this. Talk to Spinel. Start thinking about what you want to be. You’re free now.”  
Pearl smiled “You’re free. You just need to figure out what that is for you.”  
Pink Pearl looked at the two of them, turned on her heel and left, finally leaving Pearl alone with Garnet. She faced the statue.  
“I’m sorry.”  
“Garnet? Whatever for?”  
"I should have seen this. I- I let you down. I let Steven down."  
"Don't be silly, you can't get everything right. Besides I was the one who took the chance, this is my fault, my mistake.” and now I’ve left you two alone with Steven. Her stomach lurched and she suddenly half expected Garnet to scold her for her recklessness. But to her surprise, Garnet began to sing.

‘I saw the beginning, of something newer,  
A happier time, a quiet life too,  
All going out healing, living at last,  
Amethyst Steven, Me and You!

It was fair to say it was Perfect  
Going from fighting to build in peace,  
Healing all of those who had been hurting  
Giving them release,

I saw the beginning, of something new!  
A new life that would never end,  
Safe among family, Joy among friends  
Thought it was a beginning not an eeeennd!

I saw you fighting for a better world,  
Us old crystals and a group of Pearls  
But no weapons were out beside us  
Our preconceptions were all inside us  
Keys unlocking the locks that kept us held!

I saw the beginning, of something new,  
But I couldn't see this, happen to you!  
I have been caught up, in an imagined world  
That I wouldn't see the danger that unfurled

I saw something beginning, something so bright,  
Something much better, something so right,  
I saw the beginning of something new,  
In another world where nothing bad happened to you!

After it all I might well have been blind.  
I couldn't see you here my friend,  
I was so caught up in a perfect life,  
I thought it was a beginning not an end!"

I saw the beginning, of something new,  
I never saw it'd be the, end of you!  
I was so caught up in a perfect life,  
That I forgot:

"Perfect is a lie."

"Pearl, I'm going to see if there is another way out of this. I won't rest until we fix this." Garnet then disappeared out of sight, only the lack of sound from the warp pad telling her she hadn’t left. But Pearl was alone with her thoughts.  
So, she’d accidentally activated a ‘make a Pearl into a statue if they reveal our secrets’ device or programming. Wording for the request of keeping a secret must be important or this would have happened to her some time ago, and she’d have likely been shattered along with the Beach house. Steven’s healing didn’t work. But why? Maybe it meant she wasn’t broken? But she wasn’t corrupted either because the Diamonds would have healed her. What had they done to her? What had they done?

The silence started to crawl inwards, the vast darkness of space growing and swallowing up the stars, coming for her. “Garnet,” She couldn’t stop it. “Garnet help me!” She flailed out, desperately trying to fend it off, gasping for air. The warp pad chimed breaking through the fog with its bright clear note. A second of fear followed as for one moment a treacherous thought suggested that Garnet had abandoned her, then Steven spoke.  
“Garnet, you’re supposed to stay with her, you’re supposed to keep her company!” He popped back into view. “Pearl, it’s okay, we’re here. We’re not going to leave you behind.” She saw the red lines around his eyes, though he wasn’t crying now. “Amethyst is getting the others. Peridot might be able to help figure something out with those little robots of hers.” A thought popped into Pearls head unbidden, the mechanoids trying to repair her like a warp pad, covering her in that goo. Hopefully that wasn’t going to be necessary, but in the meantime Steven made another attempt to heal her.  
“Steven, you’ve tried that already. Please stop.” He pulled away, but she knew in her heart that had nothing to do with her. “I don’t want to risk you losing your powers over me.”  
“Steven!” Bismuth’s voice rang out across the garden, and soon the rest of the crystal gems were there, almost clambering over each other to get a look at her for themselves. Bismuth came close “Pearl,” she whispered “What have you gotten yourself into now?” She brought out an eyepiece to inspect the stone, and Pearl thought she had heard Peridot before she was swarmed by her helper bots. Perhaps her nightmares of being patched up like one of the warp pads wasn’t as far-fetched as she hoped.

"I think” Steven’s voice snapped her back to the present “we should take turns to keep her company." Good on Steven, trying to organise the others.  
"Steven, how do we even know if she's still in there?" Bismuth asked "How can you be sure we're not just looking at a statue?"  
“You’re not. Please, I’m still here.” Pearl called out in the desperate hope that something got through.  
"Her gem. It's still there. It's not broken, or shattered. If it's still here then she must be too."  
“I am.” Pearl almost cried in relief. He always had such faith, such optimism. “Oh Steven I am.” She caught a glimpse of Peridots yellow hair at the edge of her vision, but then Bismuth came in close leaning right over her to look at her gem, blocking out the light. Pearl reached out, struck with the urge to leap into her arms like the old times as though she’d just been away on one of her trips, or their missions. But once again her viewpoint stayed resolutely the same, her phantom limbs reaching only empty air. She was still a statue “fragile,” She caught the fired up tones of Amethyst giving Peridot a telling off somewhere behind her. “you might shatter her, and not just her gem! You have to be more careful!”  
Just a statue.  
"Garnet, what do you see?" Bismuth asked.  
“There are many possibilities at this point. I need more time.”

I need more time.

The words seemed to echo around in Pearls head. She knew Garnet, she knew how she worked and she had heard that before. She knew what it meant. ‘I can’t see a way out of this.’ ‘I haven’t found a way out of this yet.’ Pearls mind drifted once more.

“Garnet, any ideas?” She knew that voice in an instant. Rose.  
“I need more time.”  
“More time? We don’t have time!” Pearl panicked.  
“Pearl, we can do this.” More memories, plush and Pink as Rose’s warmth filled her as she spoke, the three of them stuck in a small stone room with a single metal door, their words chased by the sounds of a battle beyond. “We just need the right strategy.” Behind them Garnet started punching the wall, cracks appearing in the stone as it began to flake off.  
“How? Rose, they’ve just cut off our only escape, they're coming for us. We have to fight our way out,” Pearl pointed to the door “but there are so many of them. We can’t fight all of them like this, we’ll be shattered!” Rose looked away. Garnet had paused, her gauntlets away, and was staring at her hands.  
“We’re not getting out like this.” She turned to Pearl, holding out her hands, showing the gems. “Pearl, you need to fuse with me.”  
“But we’ve never...” Pearl remembered her doubts, but took hold of Garnets hand anyway. They had danced, fusing into a maelstrom of colour, the new fusion a blurry dizzying spin as they had drilled their way out, Sardonyx finally emerging into the moonlight.

Pearl resurfaced, the garden just where she’d left it. She could see Steven hanging back, watching her. For a moment he felt more distant than ever. No more fusions. A blue sheet of water interrupted the view, distorting him as Lapis landed in front of Pearl, her water wings flexing up and down almost twitching themselves into flight. Lapis stood right in front of the statue. She went to speak then looked away, rubbing her arms as she tried to find the words. Lapis tensed and looked at the statue once again. "I, um...” Her voice caught, horror flashed across her face and she dashed away flitting out of sight. Steven called out to her and followed.

"Oh Lapis, was this what it was like for you in the mirror all that time?” Pearl mourned "We should never had left you in there. We should have known better." But it wasn't just mirrors. Combs, walls, even buildings existed constructed from gem forms, unable to move, to touch, to talk with others. But they were programmed that way, designed for that purpose. Surely it couldn't be that bad, could it? Yet she knew it was another quiet fantasy, a cheap hope, like waiting for a solution that evaded the Diamonds.

There was little to do but wait, listening the mutterings of Peridot over her tablet as the others talked about a rota. ‘No I’m taking the third shift’ ‘But they expect me at the forge’ ‘the forge can wait’

“Hey Peridot,” Steven was back, and a lot closer. “Find anything yet?”  
"Steven, we have been here for all of ten minutes. Proper scientific process takes time, diligence and-”  
“Soo, what have you got?” Steven asked.  
“Hmpf." Peridot took a look at her results. "Well I’m definitely getting some atypical readings, although that could be a result of leftover energy from the Diamonds healing. I mean it all had to go somewhere didn’t it.”  
“I don’t feel energetic.” Pearl pondered.  
“What about Pearl? Is she still here?”  
“Yes! Yes I am!”  
“The results on that are, uncertain.”  
“No they’re not!” Pearl paused “Well they might be, but I’m certain I’m here. I am here!”  
“I can’t really say if it is her or not- there’s too much interference. Without a similar example to compare my results to I can't tell you any more than that." There was a pause. "What?"  
“What is it?” Pearl asked as they disappeared taking any answers with them. Her curiosity drew her with the others, but she found herself left with Amethyst. She stood before her, scuffing the floor with her foot.

“So Garnet had me tidying the house and I kinda just dumped all the junk in my room again.” She seemed to watch her a little longer than usual. She kept trying.

“Sooo… I was thinking of re-decorating the place whilst I’m at it. Go all in on the paint theme, add one or two odd pieces here and there, well wherever they’re gonna laand!” She laughed “I don’t know which ones either. I’ll just close my eyes and grab whatever from my room. It’ll be shabby chic, just without the chic. What do you think huh?”

“Aww, what a thoughtfully horrendous idea.” Pearl could see what Amethyst was trying to do, and her heart went out to her, but even as she started shifting into a menagerie of animals Pearl was still unmoved. She couldn’t even see some of the smaller ones, although- Argh! She flinched as Amethyst flapped about her head in purple bird form, disappearing off to the left for a little bit, then the right. She caught glimpses of her flapping from her shoulders. What was she up to? “Ahh!” Pearl flinched again, this time desperately trying to throw herself back out of the way as Amethyst flapped around her face. This went on a little while as Amethyst refined the size of herself, her gem becoming a little front heavy for the pigeon she settled on as with a triumphant coo she landed on Pearls nose. “Alright, that’s enough, you’ve had your fun, now get off!” Amethyst bopped her head up and down. “Go on then, shoo!” Amethyst turned, tail feathers brushing Pearls face, and Pearl tensed for a moment.

But Amethyst finished the turn, and continued to bob up and down in view, still firmly on her nose.

“Nnnggh! AMETHYST!” Her protest did nothing, and she simply had to watch and wait cross-eyed until Amethyst got distracted, taking off to join Lapis as she looped above them. "Hey, Lapis Tag!"  
There was a pause, and then a thump as Amethyst hurtled out of the sky, landing in the bushes accompanied by spatters of water.  
Pearl once again wondered where the others had gone.

The others returned from the hall. Peridot was going on about running an experiment through the warp, which Garnet quickly put her straight on.  
"Well we need some way of getting a signal over there! How else am I supposed to work? Without a baseline across both sites my measurements are meaningless! Utterly useless!"  
"Signal?" Bismuth frowned  
"Of course! I'm a genius! We'll have to rig up a transceiver and antenna to broadcast the signal manually.” Peridot seemed pretty excited. “Now we'll have to set up the dish as far up as possible."  
"Unless you intend to hold it up yourself, that plan won't work."  
"Garnet's right. We could shatter the glass if we try to attach it up there." Bismuth added “which would not be good news”  
"There's no airlock either so you can't put it outside easily," Pearl pointed out "and Steven needs to breathe."  
"Us gems would be fine, but Steven needs air to breathe." Pearl did a little double take as Garnet echoed her. Right, they couldn’t hear her.  
"I suppose a ground array will suffice, but it'll need to be much bigger to make up for lost range." Peridot scampered off with Bismuth in tow.

A ghost. That’s what Steven had called them, strange fantastical and entirely fictional apparitions of deceased humans that were meant to drift around in the dark and unoccupied corners of buildings, occasionally making sounds to spook people, and occasionally making an appearance. There were humans who made a living going out looking for these ‘ghosts’ and for some reason Steven liked watching them run around empty castles looking for them, even if it did mean he would have nightmares afterwards, despite her assurances that ghosts weren’t real.

"Oh, sorry, sorry." Steven was there, she could hear him trying to help the others.  
"Steven, be careful!" It was strange, not being able to see what was going on. She could only piece together what scraps she heard. That’s another thing ghosts were supposed to be able to do, to fly around and walk through walls. She was very much anchored to the spot.  
Peridots voice cut through again. "Well these vines have got to go."  
"Yeah careful P, those things-"  
"Ow!" Peridot yelped.  
"-are spiii-key."  
"Oh my stars! It's gone right through. How is an organic that sharp? Actually, what is this plant?" Peridot gasped "It's not poisonous is it?"  
"Peridot slow down, I can heal that." Steven spoke again "but that's going to have to come out first."  
"Fine, but I don't wanna look."  
There was a pause.  
"There, good as new. Maybe we shouldn't be grabbing alien thorns with your bare hands."  
"You’re right. An alternative strategy is required. Let's burn them all!"  
"Wait, Peridot that's not-"  
"No." Garnet put her foot down.  
"Garnet!" Peridot tried to protest, but it was no use.  
"Maybe we should just cut them down." Bismuth calmed them, coming in with the voice of reason.  
"Yeah," Amethyst piped up, "and I know where we can get some swords."

Wait.  
"Oh no, oh no you don’t! Don't you dare Amethyst!" Pearl shouted after her as her footsteps went out of earshot. "you leave my things alone!" Ugh. Pearl vowed that when she got out of here she would-

What if she couldn't? Her stomach lurched. If she couldn't escape it didn't matter whether Amethyst used her stuff or not because she wouldn't be able to.

There was shouting behind her.  
"No, no, no I said move to your left! Your LEFT!" There was a loud crash. “Your OTHER left!”  
"Steven watch out!"

Bang!  
Boink  
Bonk  
Pearl tensed as she heard something rolling closer, then Steven rolled into view encased in his bubble, coming to a stop in the undergrowth. He clambered out and waved back. "I'm fine, I'm fine!"  
"Not that way you clods!" The argument continued and Steven smiled sheepishly.  
"They’re trying to connect this place up with wi-fi, or something. I should probably leave them to it." He came closer "How are you doing Pearl?” Pearl stayed quiet as Steven looked down at his hands. “My healing powers are working but I haven’t worked out why aren’t they working for you yet.” He licked his hand once more, pausing to apologise before he reached out to her once again. “Maybe it just needs some time to kick in. There’s a lot of stone here to work through. Peridot says that once she has her sensors set up we can run some tests to see if there’s any change when I’m healing you, see if it is helping. We can also test using the fountain water, see if that works. We’ll find a way to undo this Pearl, we’ll get you back somehow, don’t you worry.” He gave her a thumbs up, and a smile, but she could see his own worry behind it.

“Oh Steven, I didn’t mean to scare you like this.” Pearl spoke “I’m sorry. If I hadn’t tried to tell you about Pink, this wouldn’t have happened. I thought… I just thought...” Pearl trailed off. “Who am I kidding? I didn’t think. I didn’t think it through. It doesn’t help her, you knowing what White did. If Pearl wanted us to know she would have told us. We should have just talked to her, I should have just talked to her. We should have listened instead of going off and doing what we wanted, instead of just doing it for ourselves. We offered for help and we really didn’t help at all, we only helped ourselves. I just wanted to be rid of secrets.” Pearl caught herself, realising what she was saying.

“I just thought I was going to be free.”

Pearl started. Steven had gone, disappeared from her sight. She shouldn’t be surprised, she scolded herself. A statue isn’t exactly good company. She could hear raised voices behind her panicking over fragile pillars. A couple of seconds later two loud crashes rumbled, and a dust cloud wafted over her view, filling her vision with white specks. She couldn’t even blink that away, even the tears faded from her like ghosts. She couldn’t do anything like this, she couldn’t do anything! She couldn’t even tell him she was… alive? What if she wasn’t? What if she was just an echo, a leftover memory of who she was, somehow attached to the statue of her former self, already doomed to fade away. “I’m sorry Steven, I can’t...” undo this.

Lapis appeared, landing in front of her, fists clenched as she determinedly looked her in the eye.

“It’s okay Lapis, you don’t need to-” Pearl started, but the blue gem raised a hand and a stream of water came to her from the nearby fountain building up above her shoulder into a floating blob. What was she doing? Pearl watched as a small push guided it towards her enveloping her until it wrapped all around her, filling her vision with blue tinted ripples and distorting and muffling the sounds from the garden beyond. A gentle wash of water sounded as the water flowed gently to and fro around her, guided this way and that by a wave of a hand. A flourish swept it all away, her vision cleared and the straggling drips jumped off her as Lapis did one final pass, taking all and gunk off her. She was clean! “Thank you.” Pearl whispered, once again feeling tears in her eyes.  
Lapis looked away and Steven came over to join her, beaming "Great idea Lapis! That was really thoughtful of you!"  
"Well I figured as she likes everything being neat and tidy and clean...."  
Garnet joined them, allowing Pearl to catch a glimpse of her gleaming self and her heart skipped as the team gathered around her.  
Garnet leaned over and mussed up Stevens hair "Your healing powers are pretty gross."  
He chuckled and rubbed his head "Yeah, I guess so."  
There unseen to anyone Pearl smiled.

The Crystal Gems kept working on the sensor array until it was completed before starting to drift back to Earth, only returning for their shifts. Steven stayed by Pearls side as much as he could, constantly chatting to her trying to get the other gems involved where he could, only taking short breaks for Human necessities. Pearl was vaguely aware that Peridot was running some sort of tests on her whilst this was all going on but she found she didn’t mind. If it helped her get out of here, she was all for it. Bismuth would come him and regale Steven with stories from the rebellion, whilst Amethyst kept trying to annoy her out of her shell. Ah, yes. Pearl remembered, she needed to give Amethyst a telling off after that last stunt.

Amethyst had been shifting into all sorts of different creatures when Steven returned from one of his breaks. "Hey Amethyst."  
A particularly surprised walrus rolled back into her gem self, "Oh hey Steven. I was just trying to-” Amethyst’s face flushed. “Well I thought that she might come back if she wanted to tell me off enough. It always annoyed her when I messed around like this. Huh." She looked to Pearl. "Guess I never thought I'd miss her telling me off this much."  
"I know. Hmm. I might have an idea."

"Help! Heeelp!" Steven cried "It's got mee!" Steven flopped about in the mouth of the purple crocodile. "Who is going to save me from this terrible beast?" he cried.  
“Amethyst, you put him down Right this instant!” Pearl shouted  
Amethyst growled and shook him about a bit, looking menacing. There was a pause, and Steven tried to pick it up again. "Err, Woe is me! Surely this crocodile is going to devour me whole!"  
"Dude, quit wriggling" Amethyst mumbled.  
"Don't do that you nearly bit me!"  
“Amethyst!”  
The crocodile reared up and spat him out. "Blurgh, blurgh." Amethyst spat over the floor, desperately trying to clear her mouth out.  
“Well,” Pearl admonished “I don’t know what you were expecting.”  
“Don’t worry, it was worth a try.” Steven reassured her, then his face dropped into deep thought. “Hmmm.” he pondered tapping his chin. “Hey Amethyst, do you think you could do a dragon?”

After a while Connie had arrived, carrying her sword.  
“I figured if she can’t come to us for training, we might as well do it here."  
“Great ide-” Steven yawned, blinking his eyes “-a.” She was looking at him. “What? I’m fine.” He poofed up his shield. “Sword practise!”  
“Now as Pearl’s not able to be our opponent today,” Connie said, “we’ll have to spar each other.”  
“Yes ma’am!” Connie turned away to get some space so missed it as Steven yawned again, but Pearl saw.  
“Steven, you’ve been here for hours, you need to go get some food, and sleep.” Pearl told him off, watching him carefully. Didn’t any of the other gems remember he was still part human? He had been here too long and now he was about to do sword training. What on Earth was he thinking?! “Steven, be careful!” She cried out as Connie leapt in for the first attack, but Steven brought his shield up, fending them off. They circled around each other. “Connie, watch your weight over the back leg! Remember your form!”  
Steven charged Connie, who deftly stepped out of the way.  
“Nicely done.” Steven complimented her.  
“Why thank you.” Connie immediately pursued the counter-attack, not allowing Steven to let his guard down. They kept going, allowing each other the chance to attack and counter-attack, until Steven called a hold, panting heavily.  
“Aren’t we,” Steven puffed “supposed to, do a warm up?”  
“What? Steven, that was the warm up.”  
“Oh good. Because I am warm.” He was sweating profusely.  
They kept going, running through a series of her drills before sparring again. Pearl watched, engrossed in the spectacle before her. They had both improved so much since they first started training, and here was a flowing demonstration of that proficiency… Her heart caught as Steven paused to yawn, unaware of Connie’s blade coming down towards his head. “STEVEN!” she cried out, but Connie turned the blade at the last moment letting it bounce harmlessly off his hair, only cutting away a couple of strands.  
"Ow." Swords did still have some weight to them.  
“Focus Steven!”  
“Right.” He readied himself for the fight again, Pearl tensed as Peridot’s triumphant exclaimation distracted him once more.  
“Steven!” Connie’s voice snapped over him, but she’d already put her sword away, looking at him with concern. “Steven, maybe this isn't the best idea right now. This isn’t a fair fight." Finally, Pearl thought, someone with some sense.  
"No no it's fine, I'm" he yawned again "ready for anything."  
“As long as ‘anything’ is bed, and Sleep.” Pearl said.  
Connie narrowed her eyes "Steven, when was the last time you slept?"  
"Last night." Steven defended.  
"Uh-huh." Connie placed her hand on her hip "and what day was that?"  
"Tuesday?"  
"Steven," Connie yelled "It's Thursday!"  
“Gah!” Pearl balked at how much time had passed. “Steven, you need to listen to Connie.”  
"But-” Steven tried to protest, “but Pearl,"  
"Pearl would be telling you the exact same thing." Connie insisted.  
“Darn straight I would!” Unseen from the sidelines Pearl cheered her on “You tell him Connie!”  
"Peridot! Wait, Peridot!” Steven rushed off after Peridot “Did you find something?"  
"Well… yes”  
Wait, what? Pearl listened carefully.  
“Yes!” Steven cheered.  
“and no, no not really.” Peridot continued “Well maybe, but for it to stand any chance of working I'd have to hack right into her core programming and make some tweaks."  
“Excuse me?” Pearl was incredulous. “Hacking? No-”  
“Is that dangerous?”  
“Terribly!” Peridot was unnecessarily enthusiastic about it. “If it goes wrong it could completely obliterate any traces of sentience.”  
“No,”  
“We would lose her forever! She’d be reduced to no more than a dumb lump of stone,”  
“No,”  
“which thinking about it wouldn't be much different to the current state of affairs. I'll go get the pliers!"  
“NO! Nobody is hacking me!” Pearl shouted, “Do you hear me?”  
"We are not hacking anybody." Pearl breathed a sigh of relief as Garnet intervened at last. “Connie's right. You need sleep."

Finally. Finally the others had realised they needed to look after Steven too. He kept trying to be so bubbly about all of this but she knew some part of him would still be blaming himself. If she could somehow just tell him to not worry about her, to just look after himself first she would have done so a long time ago. The warp pad chimed. Peridot muttered a small ‘hey’ to the approaching gem.

"Hey P," Bismuth appeared in view. "I know I always said you should grow a hard skin, but this," she rapped her knuckles against the stone "is not what I meant." She forced out a chuckle and fell silent.  
"Do you remember when Lexi got bitten by a snake? She got frozen for three days straight. We were using her as a hat stand! Still got no idea what was in that creature, and she wasn't telling, but she came out right as rain from it all. Oh, oh, and what about that time they nearly discovered my forge? You guys hid in tunnels and ambushed them by leaping out the walls! Boom! They could hardly move in the tight space but you were like," Bismuth mimicked Pearl with her sword, darting about and cutting gems down. "They ran away so fast! You sure put the fear of gods into them when you said, now what was it? Oh yeah! 'I told you they were easily bluffed. This'll be a great way to whittle down their numbers.' I couldn't believe it worked, they didn't attack the forge again, never even came close. I bet they were having Pearl shaped nightmares for years after that." Bismuth sighed. "You know like this you would probably fit your armour better. I've still got it somewhere. I always meant to adjust it back somewhat, I mean weight wasn't an issue, just manoeuvrability. Funny I'd have thought being smaller would have meant you could move more, not less but well I guess we all learnt from that one. You managed to do a pretty good job of dodging attacks without it, although there are still more than a few occasions where I wish you had been wearing it particularly that one where…" Bismuth winced. “Yeah.”

"Daggers, see now daggers are a nasty weapon, designed to hurt you when you've already taken out the opposition. I remember your first words to me after that particular kerfuffle. 'I'm going to need a longer sword'. I also remember your second lot of words, but I don't think Ruby would appreciate me repeating those. But, once I'd convinced you to go for a spear and not a ridiculously oversized blade, you really embraced it. Although I can't believe you picked a fight with a shark..."  
"It was trying to eat me. Who knows where I'd have ended up?"  
“You were one of our best fighters,” Bismuth sighed “now look at you. A statue. All those years fighting the war, and now this? We won! How could they let this happen?”  
Peridot excused herself. “I’ll just be on Earth. Where it’s quieter.”  
“Bismuth,” Pearl called out, her heart breaking as her friend let her emotions gush forth.  
“How are the Diamonds still doing this to us? They knew, they KNEW about this and didn’t do anything!”  
“Bismuth, they tried. They tried to heal me.”  
“I’m telling you Pearl, they’re holding out on us- White knows something and she isn’t telling. She just doesn’t want to be in the wrong again. Hey, it doesn’t matter if she turns our friends into statues if ‘oh woopsy daisy, it looks like I can’t undo that!’. She MAKES pearls!” Bismuth panted “She knows everything about them, and she should know how this works, how we can undo this.”  
“Bismuth if you think she can help then get Steven to talk to her. She’ll listen to him.” Pearl watched the fury in Bismuth’s face, her own memory of White Diamond striking down her friends, striking down Pink Pearl, coming to the fore. A horrible image of the same fate coming to Bismuth filled her mind. “You can’t fight her. Please Bismuth!”  
“We just have to get her to undo this!  
“She doesn’t know.” Pearl kept trying to explain, to calm Bismuth “They didn’t know about the corruption either.”  
“We have to make her undo this! She’s not the Leader, she doesn’t have her armies, her soldiers to protect her any-more. We just go in, drag her back here and make her undo this. Sure, what does it matter if I get shattered? I don’t care! After everything we’ve been through… I can’t lose you now, not like this.” She fell to her knees “Not like this.”  
The warp pad chimed again. Bismuth raised her head as Peridot came nearer.  
“I forgot my tablet.” Peridot explained.  
“Wait,” Bismuth called out, climbing to her feet. “Was there anything?”  
“Any… what?”  
“Signals, since you left.” Bismuth went red, but Peridot didn’t answer “C’mon, there’s gotta be something!” Bismuth stepped out of sight.  
“Hey, keep your hands off that!”  
“I’m just having a look.”  
“No!” Peridot cried “There’s nothing to look at!”  
“No...” Bismuth said in disbelief.  
“I haven’t had any new signals on my sensors from her the whole time they’ve been up!” Peridot grumbled “And if you think I wouldn’t tell you if I had then you’re WRONG.” There was a pause.  
“I’m just a ghost.” Pearl realised. She tried once again to close her eyes, shut herself off from the scene before her but she was trapped, stuck in this purgatory neither truly alive or dead.  
“I- I’m sorry. I just…”  
“Aren’t you meant to be keeping her company?” Peridot pointed out “Instead of bothering me.”  
Bismuth reappeared, tears in her eyes. “I… hey Pearl, sorry about all that.” She stood awkwardly, trying to find something to talk about. “Did Rose ever tell you about the plan me and Garnet came up with to take the galaxy warp out with a volcano?”

Garnet. The leader of the Crystal gems plagued Pearls mind as Bismuth left, and Amethyst came and went. Garnet always saw the possibilities of the future, she could see. She would know.

“Garnet? Please, just look me in the eyes and tell me there’s a way out of this.” Garnet stood, pushing her visor into place, the light catching her ring as she gave her a small wave, and strode out of view with her usual confidence. Pearl knew that swagger all too well, and an almost silent exhale of air told her everything she needed to know when it tiredly worked it’s way back to her. “You still can’t see me. How long has it been now? How many futures have you trawled for me? You’ve found ways through tougher puzzles for less, perhaps it’s time to start facing up to the truth.”

“Everything I was made to do, to be, everything I am and was, is over. It’s over.” It felt strangely freeing to say it out loud.

No more laundry, no more cleaning,  
No more adventures, no more Steven.  
Here she was now, in her love’s own garden,  
Where flowers would bloom, and stars would go by them  
Quartz between roses, warmed only by sun,  
The end of a line that her time was done

‘It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it, Isn't it over?  
It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it, Isn't it over?  
You won, and she froze you,  
and he loved you, and now I’m gone.  
It's over, isn't it? Now you must move on

War and glory, our rebellion  
Fusion, freedom, new attention,  
Out in daylight, our potential,  
Bold, precise, experimental,  
Who am I now in this world, this strange shelter?  
Petty and dull with no voice about her?  
What does it matter, it's already done.  
they’ve got to face up the fact that I’m gone!

It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it, Isn't it over?  
It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it, Isn't it over?  
You won, and she froze you,  
and he loved you, and now I’m gone.  
It's over, isn't it? Now you must move on’

Pearl let all her emotion hang out with the song, and sighed. It was all up to them now. She no longer had any power to help them, and that was… okay. They’d already finished so many battles, and found so many new allies that the loss of one pearl wouldn’t matter. They would just have to learn to live without her, like she had with Rose. Her stomach lurched. That hadn’t gone smoothly though, had it? Here she was, stuck, unable to tell Steven it was all right, to tell him she didn’t blame him, to tell him that she loved him and all her hopes and wishes were with him.

A new face, or rather an old one, appeared in her view, stood back and studying her with concern.

“You were Pinks Pearl once.” Pearl pondered “You cared for her, you looked after her, grew up with her too. Why did we never talk? Everything we’d gone through, you...”

“You hardly knew me.” Pink Pearl faltered. “I guess you knew me mostly under White’s control but that’s not exactly me. I say ‘Not exactly me’- it wasn’t me. So why did you want to help me? Why would you risk this,” she gestured angrily at the statue, “for me?”

“I should have spoken to you sooner.” Pearl said.

“I know we haven’t talked. I know we have hardly met. I know that so much time has passed and so much has changed, even for you. I know you only came to help and all I needed to do was talk but it’s hard. You replaced me.”

“Pearl,”

“You smiled and watched as they struck me down, then happily stepped into my place.”

“It wasn’t as happy as all that.”

“Then you were here, extending the hand of friendship and I don’t know how I’m meant to feel about that. You, her, the Crystal Gems have changed so many things since then, and everyone’s saying it’s for the better, and I can see that but, I’m still angry with it all, and I can’t even decide who I’m angry at. You, for doing your job? Pink, for leaving me? Myself, for getting in that mess in the first place? I knew it wasn’t proper but it made her happy, they always wanted her to be happy, how was that wrong?”

“It wasn’t, they were-”

“Now I’m here. The Future. I’m finally free again, everyone’s free(!).” she let out a short sharp laugh “But I’m more lost than ever. Everybody's been celebrating Pink Diamonds return but she’s not is she? She’s never coming back. Not for me, not for you, not for Them.”

She continued. “Spinel gets that, a little too well. But she says you just move on. That’s what I’ve been doing, what I’ve been trying to do these past two years. But here he is. Everything she was, rocking up on your doorstep like some faulty programme you just can’t shut away. Spinel makes it look so easy.”

“Sometimes I wonder if it would it be easier if I could hate him too?” She posed hands on her hips, mimicking Steven: “‘Gee Pearl, sorry I left you to be mind controlled for millenia and never checked in on you for these last two years now I know you exist again, but please, let me know what token gesture I can do to make it look like I’ve been helping you all along.’”

“He tries,” Pearl attempted to explain for her, “he really does but he can’t help everyone. He would never look after himself, and believe me, his heart’s big enough to try.”

“Back there you said you wanted to help. I don’t even know how you would start.” She looked up “Not like this. You should have just let it be. But you remembered this.” Pink ran her hand over her scar. “You had to tell him.”

“Of course I did. Didn’t it strike you as odd that he never knew, that he never asked you about it?” Pearl faced up to her “She told me to keep it from my very own Diamond. The first and worst secret I ever had to keep, and it hurt her so much, and I had to stand by her side and watch all that time. I had to watch it eat away at her, I had to take the pain that it caused! I have seen secrets tear so many people I care about apart that I wasn’t going to let this one continue to stand in the way of this one chance of helping put someone back together for a change. I’d already held onto this for far too long, I was glad to tell him. I’m done with secrets.”

“But it didn’t change anything! Now you’re like this and it’s worse than ever!” Pink pearl wrapped her arms around herself and paced up and down for a bit before continuing. “Can I tell you a secret? I hardly know him, but she’s a part of him, My Diamond... You were there, you were there for her all that time and I- wasn’t. We were so happy together. She, she truly believed I was Perfect and you know what? For a while so did I.” She touched her eye again. “I was a fool. Pearls are meant to serve, but, who do I serve now? What do I do now? I’ve been trying to figure out where I should be for so long and here I am. Still looking. You served her too. But now she’s gone, what am I left with? What am I without her? There’s meant to be this whole new world, all this change that’s meant to free us and still nobody has any answers. Why don’t I know how to live on with this? How did you stay with him after she was gone?”

“I don’t know. I can't really explain it that well.”

“I just need to know, you know? Understand it all for myself. I’ve heard the stories, but I’m just a stranger on the outside when once upon a time I was writing them.” The pink gem looked down “You know what: I wish I had been there. I wish I had stayed by her side. Her colony, Earth, the war, even her new life, everything you lived and I...”

“Everything I lost, Pearl I lost so much in those years. You don’t understand. It was never easy.”

“...left behind. I just want everything back. I just want my life back.”

Pearl watched the grief upon Pinks face and sighed, and began to sing.

‘You couldn't have loved her like I loved Her,  
You couldn't have yearned to make her smile  
I always tried to make her happier, but  
There was something we couldn't let by

Together everything was beautiful  
Together everything was right  
She saw beauty all around of her  
We could put anything right

I always worked to make us stronger  
Standing up with her to fight  
I would have given all my lives for her  
I would follow her to night  
And she was gone oh how I cried

That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds side.  
Together we would fly,  
I did all I could to help her  
How could I have lived without her  
I don't know, but I try

But that wasn't the end of it all  
She was replaced there by her son  
He was cared for by his human father  
And when he was gone oh how he cried  
In a while he grew and stayed with us  
Learned about his gem half too.  
In time he grew into his powers  
And he reminded me of you!  
But you were gone, oh how I cried!

That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we would fly  
I did all that I could to help her  
How could I have lived without her  
I don't know, but I tried”

Pink Pearl stood quietly in front of her then, to Pearls’ surprise, began to sing.

‘You couldn't have loved her like I loved Her,  
You couldn't have yearned to make her smile’

“What?” Pearl listened catching the words as they seemed to slip through to her core.

‘I always made her happier’

“Pink, you can hear me! Please tell me you can hear me.” Pearl begged her counterpart to hear her, but she sang on.

‘I always made her strong  
And when she was gone oh how I cried

That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we ccould flyyyy!  
I did all I could to help her,  
how can I now live without her  
I don't know, but I try

“We connected! Pearl, you gotta tell Steven, I’m here, I’m still here!”

‘Together everything was beautiful’

“You have to hear me!”

‘Together everything was right’

“You have to help me out, you’re my only chance”

‘When she was sad I'd put my arms around her  
Then she was gone oh how I cried’

She stopped to brush away a tear.

“It’s the song isn’t it.” Pearl decided as Pink Pearl sang a more sombre chorus.

‘That's how they took my life  
Torn from my Diamonds side  
Like a fool without flight (I did)  
I did all I could to help her,  
And when our life had turned about her,  
Her response was no reply.

‘Oh Diamond did you leave me?’  
‘She never left you’ Pearl counter-sang.  
‘Oh Diamond did you see me?’  
‘She saw your pain inside’  
‘Oh Diamond can you hear me?’  
“Pearl, you have to tell him!”  
‘When you were gone oh how I cried!’  
‘When you were gone oh how she cried!’

‘You couldn't love her like I loved Her,’  
‘I cried my tears out long ago’

‘You couldn't have yearned to make her smile’  
‘My heart ached more than you know’  
‘I always made her happier’  
‘There was always something we couldn't let go.’  
‘I always made her strong’  
‘I was fighting by her side’  
‘When she was gone oh how I cried’  
‘When she was gone oh how I cried’

‘That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we would fly!  
I did all I could to help her  
How can I now live without her  
I don’t know but I try.’

‘Together everything was beautiful’  
‘She saw beauty all around her’  
‘Together everything was right’  
‘We could put anything right’  
‘When she was sad I put my arms around her’  
‘I was always sure to hold her tight’  
‘And she was gone oh how I cried’

‘That's where I lived my life  
Stood by my Diamonds Side  
Together we would fly!  
I did all I could to help her  
How can I now live without her  
I don’t know but I,  
I don’t know but I’ll try.’

“Perhaps,” Pearl eventually said into the silence between them “if he can lose one Pearl, he can find another. Perhaps you can help each other through this somehow. You just have to get to know each other, just talk to each other!" Pink Pearl had her eyes on the ground, mind racing. Then she turned to leave. “Please, just look after him for me.” Pearl asked of her this one last time. She stopped and looked back.

“Of course I will.” Pink Pearl said. “I always did.”

Her world crumbled around her. The gem knew, somehow she’d heard every single word she’d been saying. She’d shouted, cried after her to tell the others, to let Steven know but she’d ignored her, leaving without another word. Fear struck to her core as she realised how little she truly knew of the Pink Pearl. What had all those years under White Diamonds control done to her mind? How deep did the cracks run? Whatever the gem had in mind she knew it wasn’t going to be good for her, that Steven was in danger. Yet she was stuck here, her one chance at freedom a locked door.

But she waited too, a small voice spoke in the back of her mind. She waited by White Diamonds side for nearly eight thousand years.

She would wait.  
For hours on Homeworld she’d stand outside the door of the tower waiting for someone to come along. She’d salute them, raising her voice just enough to be noticed, hoping her unasked question would be answered. It was a dangerous game, courting around insolence but she tried anyway. Yellow Diamond would often ignore her, too preoccupied with chiding Pink, leaving her to have to play to Blue’s whims. There were days she had to wait it out entirely, faced with a sullen and angry Diamond at the end of it all, but sometimes the door would be held open for her and she could rejoin Pink Diamonds side, sharing the solitude together. They hardly spoke, but Pearl would sit and project the stars across the walls, tantalising images of the universe beyond whilst Pink would lie down and watch.

Did he know? Pearl wondered if Steven remembered those times as he tried to keep her company, as he kept coming back to her side. But he had been gone a while now, far longer than his usual human sleep-cycle. The news, when it came wasn’t much better.

"Data Log one-six-three-two.” Peridot started into her tablet “It's been several days since Pearls impromptu petrification, (That's the fancy word for turning to stone) and we have still had no contact from her.” Pearl grit her teeth “Her gem seems inactive but Steven believes she is still in there, and there are unusual energy readings coming from this statue. Steven took me to see a human statue for proper research comparison and it was dead. Just cold hard stone." Peridot shuddered.  
"Given the exhaustion of other possibilities, gem extraction has once again become a valid proposal, though considering the composition of the source material and it's properties, there would be a high risk of cracking said gem in the attempt and, of course in the worst case scenario, shattering it. Which would not be ideal."  
"Peridot." Garnet called out, striding over.  
"What? Oh come on I wasn't going to try and extract her gem- yet."  
Garnet crossed her arms.  
"Pearl would want us to consider this carefully," she leaned over "as a last resort."  
"Garnet, Garnet, Garnet, is there anything to consider? Only two things can happen- we get Pearl back or we don't..."  
"We cannot risk shattering her."  
"So? is that a future you can see?"  
"No."  
"Oh good, that is a weight off my mind. So do you see us getting Pearl back if we don't do this?"  
"No."  
"Do you see us getting Pearl back if we do?"  
"No." Peridot paused, trying to figure out where Garnet was going with this.  
"Do you see us getting Pearl back at all?"  
"No." Garnet paused. "I am fine." She pre-answered Peridots next inevitable question. Peridot narrowed her eyes.  
"Hmpf. Evidence would suggest the contrary." Garnet didn't answer. Peridot pondered the matter. "So, what would Steven do?" Garnet looked up. “If you don’t know what to do, maybe you need to think like someone else.” Peridot explained.  
"He would want us to try.".  
"Of course he would!" Peridot ran around, grabbing wires here and there. "Help me set this up!"  
Peridot hovered above Pearl, carefully attaching cables to her gem. "As fun as it is bossing you around, you're really taking this future vision blip to heart aren't you?"  
"I should have seen this coming."  
"Hey, I didn't see this either-"  
"You don't have future vision."  
"I have an array of algorithms I've been developing to try and predict the future. All they need to do is sort through billions of probabilities and poof out the most likely ones! For example; later today I need to go and buy ten donuts!"  
"You did that last week. Amethyst ate them all."  
"See? It works! How else would I have know that's what she wanted? It predicted the future!" Peridot seemed pleased. "Of course there is another likely reason you can't see the future." Garnet turned her head, waiting silently.  
"Me!" Peridot claimed "My unbridled genius is going to come up with a solution so awesome, so incredible and so inspired that no-one could see it coming, not even you!"  
Garnet adjusted her visor "Perhaps."  
Pearl watched the interaction, and realised she'd never gotten to see this side of them before, her unique situation providing this unexpected revelation into their relationship. Because somehow despite everything, despite her uncertainty and doubts, and Peridots near non-existent tact there was a smile hiding under that visor.  
“Wait, isn’t it Steven’s shift?” Peridot pointed out. Garnet adjusted her visor back into place, smiling.  
“He’s busy showing Pink Pearl around Earth.”  
“How nice for him. Being a tour guide.” Peridot pulled a lever and Pearl tensed, waiting for something to happen. “Nothing.” She threw her tablet out of the way “Well, I’m out of ideas.”  
They stood, looking around.  
“So what now?” Peridot asked, looking up at Garnet. Garnet shrugged. “This is so boring.” Peridot wandered over to a nearby bush and kicked a dead flower into the undergrowth. “This place is full of weeds, and dirt. Oh, we could replant the garden! It would look much better with sunflowers over there, some pumpkins over here, and forget-me-nots in the corner right there! Oh and we can even have our very own Rose garden!”  
Garnet placed a hand on Peridots shoulder “I’m sure Pearl would like that very much.”  
“Oh? Oh of course she will. I have to go get Lapis.” Peridot hurried away, then back again. “Here,” she pushed a wrench into Garnets hands “you can start by taking out all the weeds.” Garnet paused “Anything that isn’t blue.” Peridot clarified, trying to get a signal. Garnet returned with a handful of vines and Peridot leapt away from them with a hiss “I don’t want them, just make a pile over there!”

Pearl was almost glad they had something to focus on besides her. One by one Peridot roped the other gems into helping, and soon large swathes of the garden had been cleared back, and plans in place to start rebuilding. Bismuth had already got to work on the fountain. Somehow, after Garnet and Amethyst disappeared off, and Lapis, Peridot and Bismuth followed making muttered plans, Pearl was left alone with her thoughts and worries once more. Steven, where was Steven? He would love this, why hadn’t he come back?

Pearl almost didn’t notice her counterpart standing there. “Pearl, Pearl, PEARL!” Pink Pearl repeated, finally getting a response from the gem.

“You’re back, but...”

“It’s over. You won.”

“What do you mean?”

“He chose you, he doesn’t want me.” Pink looked away. “I’m leaving. I’ll go to a remote colony somewhere far away from Homeworld, and Earth. you’ll never see me again.”

“But wait, what about Spinel? Are you just going to leave her too?”

“She’ll be fine, she’s got the Diamonds to fawn over her,”

“Wait, Pearl!” Pearl called “What happened?” The Pink gem paused and looked back.

“I already told you. He chose you. He thinks I’m broken, defective. He never cared about this.” She waved at herself.

“Wait, no he wouldn’t- Steven’s not like that.” Something was wrong. “Pearl,”

“That doesn’t matter, it won’t be a problem any-more. I’ll be long gone.” Pink Pearl turned to leave.

“WAIT!” Pearl cried “Don’t go! You have to tell him, you have to tell him I’m here! Please, he doesn’t know.”

“I- can’t.” She turned away “you have to understand.”

“No, I don’t.” Pearl desperately clung on “Wait! What are you scared of? Losing him? You’re already leaving,”

The warp pad chimed, interrupting them both as Amethyst appeared, tilting her head back and letting out a frustrated roar. “Stupid place with it’s stupid inscriptions, and it’s stupid-” Amethyst caught sight of Pink Pearl and froze, cutting herself off mid sentence. She jumped high into the air, disappearing into the darkness above them.  
“Eep!” Pearl gulped and dived to one side, breaking into a run. She barely made it a few steps before the whip wrapped itself around her, sending her crashing to the floor.  
“What are YOU doing here?” Amethyst demanded stalking towards her, already drawing a second weapon.

“I, I, ah,” Pink Pearl stuttered, trying to think of something.

“You have to tell her!” Pearl encouraged her “there’s still a chance, you can still do the right thing!”

“Well?!” Amethyst demanded.

“I need to talk to Steven.” Pink Pearl said.

“You don’t need to talk to Steven, just tell Amethyst I’m here, that you can see me!”

“Why? You’ve already hurt him enough.”

“I- I need to tell him something important,” Pink pearl glanced at the statue. “I need to apologise. For earlier. In person.” Pink Pearl rolled onto her back to look up at Amethyst. “I thought he might be here.”

“Ugh, fine, I’ll take you to him.” Amethyst picked her up over her shoulder. “No guarantees though-”

“Pearl, you have to tell him.” Pearl called after her one more time, before they left, more in hope than anything else. Once again she was left in silence, until the warp pad chimed again. Her heart rose until Peridot’s voice carried over.

“Am I the ONLY one keeping to the Rota?”

They landed in the hallway, Amethyst explained as she took them through. “Steven’s asleep at the moment, but you can help us searching the hall whilst we wait. No tricks okay?” Amethyst plonked her down at the edge of the hall and waved Garnet over, explaining to her as Pink Pearl stood in shock, frozen by the scene before her: Hundreds of ghostly Pearls, and Steven, trapped amongst them all.

Steven wrestled against the hands that dragged him down, trying to form his shield, his bubble, something to push them away. None of it worked, and they blindly pulled him onwards, ghostly forms materialising and overlapping with the next,  
"Stop, Please, I can help!" The arms paused. "Just let me talk to you." They stopped for a moment, considering, then pulled at him once more, dragging and shoving him downwards. “Wait, do the Diamonds know you’re here?” The shadows flowed back and forth in sudden confusion.  
“Diamond. My Diamonds” The whispers spread around him like wildfire. “Forgive me My Diamond. Please...” The sounds grew, and Steven made another lunge for freedom in the distraction.

“They’re NOT coming back for You!” The shout cut across the space, silencing them all. “Bring him.” Once again the hands descended on him, pulling inwards once more. The shadows parted and Steven saw another pearl before him who, apart from her billowing sleeves and fitted waistcoat, looked the spitting image of Blue Diamond's Pearl. He said as much.  
"I was Blue Diamond's Pearl." She replied, turning towards him and stretching out to touch him. Steven gasped, noticing the dark cracks that ran across her shoulder, an absence of the faded colour that made the rest of her form. "Now I'm not much of anything. Down here the highlight of our day is watching some crystal lizards go by. Sometimes the others even tell me what's happening." Her hands reached up to grab his face, and as he caught a glimpse of many reflective eyes glowing behind her, he realised she couldn't see, her hair covering her eyes. "What are you?” she asked “How did you get here?"  
“I’m Steven.” He paused as her hands pulled at his cheeks, digging in a little. “how did you get here?” She let go, but didn’t answer so he tried again. “The Diamonds, did you have to keep a secret for them too?”

‘To hell with the Diamonds!’

The tune caught him by surprise and he watched as the Pearl continued to sing.

‘To hell with their orders,  
To hell with this place  
To hell with their secrets.  
We always faced an impossible choice:  
When you're caught between four types of Perfect  
There'll never be a Perfect voice!’

The other Pearls joined in, striking up a rhythm:

‘Pom, pom, pom-p-om-pom,  
Pom, pom, pom-p-om-pom,’

‘We're all caught between the diamonds,  
Lead by their guiding light  
Victims of an impossible answer  
We could never get right.

We're all caught between the diamonds,  
Lead by their guiding light  
Victims of an impossible answer  
We could never get right.’

“Of course we did! Nearly each an every one of us here had to keep a secret, Only for someone else, higher rank, usually a Diamond  
To order us to also reveal that secret.  
Boom, five minutes later, we're a statue.  
You think that's fair?”

We're all caught between the diamonds,  
Lead by their guiding light  
Victims of an impossible answer  
We could never get right.

It’s time to face up to our lives,  
I’m sorry to say but it’s true  
These four walls might just as well be  
Yellow Pink White and Bluuuue!

We're all caught between the diamonds,  
Lead by their guiding light  
Victims of an impossible answer  
We could never get right.

“Woah woah, woah! Not all the Diamonds were all that bad were they?”

“What are you on about?”

“What about Pink Diamond? She was kind.”

"Pink Diamond? PINK diamond? She's why I'm stuck in here. Her and that deceptive little Pearl of hers. Let me tell you the story:

One day,  
I was minding my Diamonds business,  
and she had the gall to be running late. (Pink that was.)  
So I was sent to find her,  
I had to remind her of this,  
particular date.  
But when I opened up the door  
I found her sobbing on the floor,  
Her Pearl all gathered in her arms  
Her servants gem nearly cracked apart  
She told me not to go and yet  
I know how she was so upset  
When you've got a new Pearl,  
That can't have been the best of ways to start!”

"What was this Pearl like? Pink?"

"No, more Peachy, with yellows and a blue, if you can call it blue, it was more pale and green really, not like my saturation."

"Poofy shoulders?"

"Poofy- yeah. How do you know her?"

"Pearl!” Steven had stopped fighting against the mass of arms holding him back. “What happened next?"

"I went and told my Diamond. Blue was always worried about Pink so I had standing orders to tell her if anything was wrong. So I did. She left, and I turned to stone."

She sang again, slower.

‘We’re all caught between the Diamonds,  
Following their guiding light  
Answering an impossible question,  
We were never going to get right’

"I'm sorry!"

"For what? That wasn't the worst part. When my Diamond returned she said she'd found nothing wrong. The Pearl was perfectly fine, and Pink Diamond had just had some wardrobe malfunction. I know what I saw! I wasn’t wrong, I'm not broken. They pranked me and I never had a chance."

"That's not true!"

"Yeah? You think you know better? How would you explain what happened?"

"Pink Diamond had healing powers!" Steven cried "her tears, they would have fixed the gem."

"Healing powers?" The blue Pearl laughed, and laughed and laughed.

"That's not funny."

"Wait, you're serious."

"The only reason I'm here is because that Pearl, my Pearl, this... The same thing has happened to her. We're trying to fix it."

"Fix it? What makes you think you can fix it?"

"I'm, I'm Pink Diamond." It took quite a while for the laughter to die down.

"I'm serious. Pink Diamond went to Earth, her colony, went down and pretended to be a quartz and she stayed there, starting a rebellion and pretending to kill Pink Diamond so she could live there in peace, except there was a war. Then she met my dad and made me. Look, I have her Diamond!" He struggled to reach to show them. They poked and prodded him

"Feels like a quartz to me."

"It's just turned around! I'm telling the truth, you have to believe me!"

“Listen squidgy, we don't care. All we know is somehow you came and talked to us here. If there's a way in, there's gotta be a way out, and you're not getting out without taking the rest of us with you."

"No! Garnet, Amethyst! HELP!"

‘We're all caught between the diamonds,  
Lead by their guiding light  
Victims of an impossible answer  
We could never get right.

We're all caught between the diamonds,  
(To hell with the Diamonds,)  
Lead by their guiding light  
(To hell with their orders,)  
Victims of an impossible answer  
(To hell with this place,)  
We could never get right.  
(To Hell with their secrets!)

“Steven!” Pink Pearl cried out desperately. The Crystal Gems turned to her, Garnet coming over quickly, seeing the panic on the Pearls face. “STEVEN!”

“What’s wrong?” Amethyst had drawn her weapon, looking around nervously.

“Steven, wake up.” Garnet immediately went to his side and shook him, and shouted louder. “Steven, you need to come back! WAKE UP!”

“He can’t, they’ve got him!” Pink Pearl took a step back and hit a pillar. Garnet jumped into the middle of the Pearls, calling Stevens name and searching. Amethyst joined her.

“Help us! Show us where he is!” Garnet demanded

Pink clutched at her head, desperately wishing the cacophony of noise away.

“You have to do something!” Amethyst shouted at her.

No, no, no no “no no no no no!” Pearl could only watch as Steven kept trying to struggle against the Pearls, calling out to her, to the gems, but starting to disappear back underneath the phantom limbs of the pearls, the effort wearing him down. They were losing him, everything he was... “Let him go!” she cried desperately, running forward and failing to grasp at the ghostly figures.. It wasn’t working!

"Let. Him. GO!" Pink Pearl shouted but this time White Diamonds commanding timber echoed around the room, reverberating around the walls as she stood there a pale light threatening to break out from her cracked eye.

Steven launched through empty space as the hands withdrew, pulling back to each of their selves in a Diamond salute, reverent mutterings of ‘My Diamond’ echoing softly around him.

Steven gasped as he fled back to himself. Garnet was there, and then Amethyst too

"Steven!" Amethyst leant over him, her face drawn with worry. “Are you okay?” He sat up, and pulled her gently to one side, looking at the statues beyond.

"There were so many of them," Steven turned to Garnet “I couldn’t get out. They’re still here. All of them.” His gaze dropped. “They hung on so tightly, but they just wanted to be free.” There were tears in his eyes.  
His eyes widened “Pearl!”

Pink Pearl started as Steven jumped up and ran towards her. She froze at his approach, yet he travelled straight past without a glance, making a beeline to the warp pad, closely followed by Amethyst. Garnet followed and grabbed Pearl along with her, pulling her away from the sight and sound of hundreds of Pearls still desperately crying out for their Diamonds, for their owners.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Less edited than usual due to time constraints. Will return to edit better later tonight (1st Dec 19)
> 
> I swear, I didn't plan this ever increasing chapter size deliberately. 
> 
> Thank you for reading, as always any feedback is greatly appreciated.

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1/5
> 
> Thank you for reading, I am always open to ongoing improvement of my work so any feedback is gratefully received.


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